Infinite Glitch - Team Philpott: Infinite Glitch - the world's longest recorded pop song, by Chris Butler.

Team Philpott

Lyrics

Sometimes you can fix something by looking at that crack
And thinking I will use no plaster

I have none in the house and so I will attack
This fissure with some tape it's faster

Sometimes you can fix something by make do and mend
And kid yourself you'll do it better (but later)

you then forget and only realize it when
That hole has now became a crater

Sometimes you can fix something by kidding yourselves
That that is just the paint that's peeling

You get that tester pot and think that it's fine
Till rain is flooding through the ceiling

Sometimes you can fix something by saying ''that'll do''
Can't do it properly too much trouble

I'll use some paste .. instead of good glue
Reduce my palace into rubble

Sometimes you can fix something by hearing that noise
And turning up the CD player

And it's OK until the black smoke appears
And you stranded out in nowhere

Sometimes you can fix something by putting it off
And hoping it can’t get much worse

And all is fine until that rattling cough
It almost puts you in a hearse

Sometimes you can fix something by a tactical vote
To stop the others getting in

Congratulations when you’’re just about afloat
But tidal waves are happening

Sometimes you can fix something by turning to Class A’s
And all your worries put on hold

You’ll be amazing interesting and blase
While problems mount ten thousandfold

Sometimes you can fix something by taking a crash course
A Surgeon’s job without the effort

But dig the scalpel in the wrong place using force
And you may find the wrong bit severed

Sometimes you can fix something by thread instead of rope
Surely a justified replacement

And when you step out you can only walk and hope
Your shoes do not end up on the pavement

Sometimes you can fix something by pretending it won’t end
Like binge watching loads of Seinfeld

And when you realize there is no season 10
Your sadness is all the more heartfelt

Sometimes you can fix something by learning to drive
To save you all hassle walking

And though to destinations quicker you arrive
Pedestrians don’t pay for parking

Sometimes you can fix something by streaming films online
For your leisurely enjoyment

Not using pirate sites your laptop will be fine
For that is copyright infringement

Sometimes you can fix something by listening to Kiss
But If I may talk freely

I much prefer the stuff with Peter Criss
Or the guitarist Ace,,,,err….um no it’s gone

Sometimes you can fix something by crystal meth
But there’s the risk you’ll go to jail

The best you’ll get is rotten breath
You’re better off with Crystal Gayle

Sometimes you can fix something by going on a cruise
It can erase all sense of panic

Until the ice berg they can’t swerve comes into view
You find you’re on the new Titanic

Sometimes you can fix something by retail therapy
It’s like Buddhism in reverse

But I would much prefer an empty property
Than opening an empty purse

Sometimes you can fix something by Photoshop
You’ll be a younger looking version

But that illusion will be set to stop
When you are close-up and in person

Sometimes you can fix something by household chores
For this removes all mess and spillage

For some this stimulates for others it bores
We clean while playing some Steve Hillage

Sometimes you can fix something by going to Stonehenge
And channeling your inner hippie

You can find inner peace but I’d rather go to Penge
I hear they have a brilliant chippy

Sometimes you can fix something by playing some guitar
They say it’s cure all therapy

But only if there is no whiplash from strings stretched far
When 2 steps up in Open G

Sometimes you can fix something by patching that tire
Although I must say at this juncture

That any piercing caused by a vampire
Is quite another kind of puncture

Sometimes you can fix something by nails and hammer
Ideally during carpentry

It does not work so well in every manner
Like bouncy castles or pottery

Sometimes you can fix something by needle and thread
Especially dresses socks and jeans

But if you fall and if you split your head
You should avoid sewing machines

The Story

We are the guys, my Dad and I, that write insane letters to popstars regarding their songs and publish their replies with full content.

Here is a link to our new book. The Waitresses are in it... Their contribution is mindblowing

unbound.com/books/dear-mr-pop-star Our facebook is www.facebook.com/ThePhilpotts/

I wrote this song, or should I say, it fell out of me, over 4 hours... It made perfect sense in the midst of a 4 pack of Polish beer rounded off by a Bloody Mary... I live near Avebury Stone Circle and the background noise you hear is what I heard at the time

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