-
- Welcome
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Click the Play button to tune in to an infinitely (or at least indefinitely) regenerating stream . . . The Infinite Glitch cycles randomly through every musical/audio chunk in our database, including the original Devil Glitch recordings, The Major Glitch online extended version, and the ever-growing pile of new submissions.
Read on for intimate details on the history of this socio-pholosophical endeavor and how you can contribute to what started off as a simple 6-minute pop song and has grown to a 5:42:49 crowd-sourced new age gospel, also known as the "gag that defied its sire".
Enjoy the project in its original CD length, listen chunk by chunk, stream it as an infinite loop, or access the song's wisdom from The Glitch Oracle. But most importantly, PLEASE check out the "Contribute" page for guidelines and tools so YOU can become a part of "The Infinite Glitch" project.
- Chris Butler
(Joke-Taker-Too-Far-Er) - WHAT?!?!?!
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In 1995, I wrote and recorded a song called The Devil Glitch, which clocked in at 5:03. One day, I'm trading off playing demos with muso pal Nick Berry from Dots Will Echo, and he plays one and I play one and he plays one and then I play him "The Devil Glitch", apologizing sheepishly 'cause the vamp at the end is 12 choruses long and I don't remember if he said it or if I said it or if the caffeine said it but suddenly we're both giggling 'cause the problem with the song isn't that it's too long it's that it's too short! and wow!...wouldn't it be cool to fill up a whole CD with choruses??
So that's what I did. Three months later I'd written over 550 of them (usually in the early, early morning before the cares of the day shut off the joy valve). I then recorded the whole thing at one sitting with an acoustic guitar (the chords are A Bm D6) to an 114 BPM click track in 20-minute chunks at Harold Dessau Studios in Lower Manhattan, with Scott Anthony engineering (and soon to be drafted as the project's long-time, long-suffering Sys Op). The next step was to pass out 2-3 minute chunks on Alesis ADAT cassettes to people I've worked with and asked them to add their own background accompaniment on synths, spoons, tuned vacuum cleaners...whatever. This was in April of '95, thinking I'd have everything back by May and the whole thing assembled by Memorial Day.Wrong. It took a year to get everything organized, but that's okay 'cause the software to actually glue the thing together wasn't available in '95, and Freedy Johnston took forever to hand in his piece (worth it) and Liam Sternberg (Mr. "Walk Like An Egyptian") from Akron and now France had to do his too and Kramer (who had been the Waitresses original sound man!) had to be goosed to get his bit in (also worth it) and don't get me started about my Mom (never try to produce your Mom).
Scott stitched the whole thing together using SAW+ (we had become a Beta project for the software!), having to regrettably edit the long version down to allow for the original 5:03 song, since at the time CDs could only hold 74 minutes of audio.
Then, thanks to the internet - there was NO time limit, so I began the process of expanding the song, making an online version that hopefully would go on for hours and hours. And it did: The Major Glitch.
The Major Glitch is a sonic "sculpture"
- a single, seamless recording that includes all the submissions to date, plus the original Intro and Ending sections from the original CD recording.Full Length: 5:42:49
And now we have The Infinite Glitch which is where you, Dear Reader, come in.
Please go to the "Contribute" page to find out how YOU can contribute to the project.
I want this song to contain the sum total of human wisdom (seriously!) and we have. . .a bit of a way to go. - Contribute
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We want everybody to be able to contribute. Whether or not you:
- have access to a recording studio
- can play an instrument
- can sing
- speak english
- can read this
Under the philosophy that anything is entertaining and insightful provided it’s sincere (or at least obviously fun), we’ve got a few options by which you can contribute.
Guidelines for Submissions:
- It can be as long or as short as you want.
- The part that I'd like for you to expand upon is the ending vamp where every lyric line begins "Sometimes you can fix something by...".
Please remember that a "song" is legally defined in America as having "a melody and lyrics", so please include some variation on the "Sometimes you can fix something by..." lyric line. Thus, instrumental-only submissions will probably not be used. I may add some lyrics to your chunk, but it will be a low, low priority. - If you're able to fit your lyric text into the couplet format: "Sometimes you can bla bla bla... Another line of bla bla... blank line... Sometimes, etc", then the Glitch Oracle will be happy.
- Re: censorship. I reserve the right to edit anything that is submitted. That said, I am not a prude, so rough language is not a turn-off...but neither do I wanna get busted for distributing internet obscenity, so use your head about what you say, okay?
- Legal stuff: You own your contribution, period - but by submitting it, you are allowing me to use it in this project in perpetuity. If you want to register it with the Library of Congress or any other performance right organization in your country, that is your business. There is a chance that some other media (TV, radio, etc.) might do a news piece on this project and use some of what you've submitted. If this happens, I will do my best to get you a cue sheet so if there is any dough generated, you get it. To that end, you must include some info about yourself, personal web page URL &/or contact info with your submission or it can't be used. You also grant me the right to use this info in the project, but I will not give or sell your info to any third party, so don't get all nutzparanoid about this. Also, you warrant that your submission does not violate the rights of any third party.
For those who want to create their own track at home or in a studio
- Submitted audio should be an MP3 or .wav file.
Preferred: wav file, 44.1 khz, at least 16 bit, 24 bit even better
OK: mp3, encoded at best resolution possible, at least 192kbps, 320kbps even better - The click and acoustic track is there for your convenience, but you are not bound to use this. And please no fade-ins or fade-outs if possible...editing this thing is going to be enough of a pain. A "1-2-3-4" count-in would be helpful, too.
- You can download the 114 Beats-Per-Minute click track/acoustic guitar file HERE
- You can submit a track HERE.
We want everybody to be able to contribute. So even if you don't have the instruments and recording equipment available, here are a couple of tools to allow you to make a track and then submit it:
Currently In Hibernation
Definitely a BETA endeavor! Using the microphone in your computer, you'll be able to record yourself singing along with the single glitch instrumental track and upload it, then hear it back with the instrumental, input lyrics and story and submit the track. "Hugh Jeerayke, the engineer" will walk you through the process of recording and submitting a track.
You will need to Sign Up before you can access this part of the Infinite Glitch.
Another BETA project we came across, which it seems like has been in limbo for a while, but still works and is really really cool: UJAM offers online software that allows you to record and produce your own song. "All you need to create great-sounding music is an idea. Turn that melody in your head into a song." After you make you track on UJAM you just export it as an MP3 and submit it using our form.
- World Records
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The Devil Glitch
World's Longest Recorded Pop Song - 69 minutes
July 11th, 1997,
Guinness Book of World Records
declares "The Devil Glitch" to be
THE WORLD'S LONGEST POP SONG.
"Then there's ex-Waitress CHRIS BUTLER'S 69-minute (!) single, "The Devil Glitch" (Future Fossil, CD), a screwy swinger with an hour's worth of Butler lyrically vamping on the end chorus as friends, old band mates, and relatives (including Freedy Johnston, Kramer, and Butler's mom) mess with the music. Weird, long-winded, wonderful."
David Fricke, Rolling Stone Magazine, June 26, 1997, p.56
THE CAST OF CHARACTERS
- Chris Butler - words, music, and production
- Paul Moschella - drums
- Matt Azzarto, Jim Higgins, Paul Moschella, Chris Gefken - backing
vocals
- Chris Gefken - extra bass snazz on the Long Version
- Supervising Engineer - Scott Anthony
Other Musicians/Bands
in order of appearance - Mars Williams
- The Whatnots
- Liam Sternberg
- Fear of Falling
- The Gefkens
- Bianca Bob Miller
- Michael Baker
- James MacMillan and Freedy Johnston - The Know It All Boyfriends
- Michael Aylward
- Harvey Gold
- Kramer
- Christopher D. Butler
- Mrs. Irene Elizabeth Butler (The Artist Formerly Known As Mom)
- Morgan McNeish
- The Fluxus Midwest
Paper Cup Marching Band
- Scott Anthony
SHORT VERSION
recorded by Scott Anthony at Harold Dessau in NYC and by Chris Gefken at Jackson Hole in Hoboken. mixed by Dave Derr at Studio E in Garfield, NJ
LONG VERSION
lead vocals recorded (no loops!) at B Jams, Hoboken, by Scott Anthony and Ben Kilmer. Mixed and assembled starting January 8th and 9th during the Blizzard of '96 by Scott Anthony at Harold Dessau in NYC. Additional transfers and duping by Greg, Steve and Chris at Upstart in Hoboken. Final assembly completed spring '96 at Mutiny Zoo in Hoboken. Mastered by Dave Steele at DBS Digital, Hoboken.
The Story Behind the One-Minute Version of "The Devil Glitch"
Morgan Fisher (ex-Mott The Hoople keyboardist) requested a one-minute version of "The Devil Glitch" for inclusion in his second "Miniatures" CD. The 60 or so compositions on this disc come from around the world and all deal in some way with a Millenium theme.
Morgan never said WHICH Millenium, however. "The Devil Glitch" includes an audio time-travel ending, which is a regression back to 1900 via the entire history of audio recording technology (digital-tape-wire-wax cylinder).
For a laugh, I sent a copy of the CD to the Guinness Book people, thinking I might have inadvertently set a record. Their response was "Maybe. Yep. Prove it." Guinness required for independent verification, and although I knew it to be a valid claim, getting others to confirm it became a "computer era" question, where information becomes available only if the question is phrased correctly.
For example, neither the Library of Congress (where American copyrights are registered), BMI and ASCAP (the USA's major performance rights organizations) nor The Harry Fox Agency (collector of mechanical rights) can search their databases for length...only by title and author. Luckily, David Sanjek of the BMI Archives was able to confirm my claim stating that "I know of no other commercial piece of music that received sufficient public distribution that comes close to "The Devil Glitch" in length and scope." William Shurck, the Sound Recordings Archivist at Bowling Green State University's Music Library and Sound Archive, also saw no reason to dispute my claim, based on his "...40-plus years of working with popular music."). Homer's "Illiad" and "Odyssey" were actually "sung". . .but no one is around who remembers how it goes. "Alice's Restaurant"? A mere 19-minutes, and it's as much talking as it is a "song", which is legally defined in America as a "lyric with a melody". I'm sure my record has long been broken, and as far as i know, Guinness has retired the category, but the original project was fun to do, and it's nice to be recognized...even for such a dubious achievement.
- Chris Butler - words, music, and production
- Lyrics
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30 couplets contributed by Bianca Bob Miller:
sometimes you can fix something by just killing the rich
I welcome that revolution
sometimes you can fix something by just checking your math
redo your calculations
sometimes you can fix something with just a tambourine
sweeten the track with some percussion
sometimes you can fix something by just screwing up
lower people's expectations
sometimes you can fix something by just lifting a line
i second that emotion
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a machine
automation speeds production
sometimes you can fix something by just dropping a name
it really helps to have a maven
sometimes you can fix something by just keeping a straight face
don't let 'em know you're laughing at 'em
sometimes you can fix something by just building a box
look what that did for Phillip Johnson
sometimes you can fix something by just refusing to vote
the last I cast was for McGovern
sometimes you can fix something by just checking the line
maybe it's just a loose connection
sometimes you can fix something by just putting on a show
like Mickey Rooney & Judy Garland
sometimes you can fix something by just having a good spot
location, location, location
sometimes you can fix something by just working up a sweat
success is 9/10ths perspiration
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a lock
just don't forget the combination
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing the code
some data's hidden by encryption
sometimes you can fix something by just saying it again
make your point with repetition
sometimes you can fix something by just poking around
everybody's hiding something
sometimes you can fix something by just calling a strike
go to binding arbitration
sometimes you can fix something by just having one
if you're the only one who has one!
sometimes you can fix something by just having one more
complete your collection
sometimes you can fix something by just being wild
resist domestication
sometimes you can fix something by just quitting your job
start living like a Bohemian
sometimes you can fix something by just going right now
there's too much traffic on the weekends
sometimes you can fix something by just growing a beard
avoid the misery of shaving
sometimes you can fix something with just the perfect scene
like waltzing in Grand Central Station
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a look
deputize a delegation
sometimes you can fix something by just saying amen
thus endeth the lesson
sometimes you can fix something by just hating the beach
that worked alright for Brian Wilson
sometimes you can fix something by calling Tom Goodkind
he's the master of shrewd thinking
29 couplets contributed by Christopher D. Butler:
sometimes you can fix something by just pounding away
get that thru your cranium
sometimes you can fix something with just a list of names
thank 'em in the dedication
sometimes you can fix something by just using a Vox
the best British amplification
sometimes you can fix something by just dropping in
my front door is always open
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a fix
tho dope is dumb by definition
sometimes you can fix something by just tapping your phone
do it for your own protection
sometimes you can fix something by just having long hair
i grok yer groovy vibrations
sometimes you can fix something by just dropping a frame
get things in synchronization
sometimes you can fix something by just being cute
everybody’s little darlin’
sometimes you can fix something by just changing its shape
they say that form follows function
sometimes you can fix something by just fixing it yourself
consider it a challenge
sometimes you can fix something by just asking for help
here...gimme that before ya break something
sometimes you can fix something by just having the knack
while other's just keep on struggling
sometimes you can fix something by ooking the other way
survive by being a good German
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "nein"
"das ist verboten"
sometimes you can fix something by just being a vamp
oozing decadent corruption
sometimes you can fix something by just falling in love
you'll feel like a virgin
sometimes you can fix something by falling in love again
ya gotta get your head examined
sometimes you can fix something by having a backyard
hang a hammock, plant a garden
sometimes you can fix something by just living in town
my whole backyard is Manhattan
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing the trick
ignore the man behind the curtain
sometimes you can fix something by just knowin' for sure
tho nothing is for certain
sometimes you can fix something by just paying the fine
avoid a lengthy prosecution
sometimes you can fix something by just knocking it down
make more room by demolition
sometimes you can fix something by trying everything you can
run thru all the permutations
sometimes you can fix something if the calla lilies are in bloom
perfect for any occasion
sometimes you can fix something by just wanting the best
I wanna own the Chrysler Building
sometimes you can fix something by just being the best
XTC's the greatest pop band
sometimes you can't fix something by just being the best
XTC's still stuck in Swindon
1 couplets contributed by Bill Janoff:
sometimes you can fix something by just freakin’ out
just going Breeeep!$#$@%$#^%$&^&$&*arrrrheeeepht!
8 couplets contributed by Livingston Leo:
Sometimes you can fix something with a new tube and speakers,
But some old jams, they're all gone
Sometimes you can fix something by moving a mountain
Just get some friends to help you
Sometimes you can fix something with a simple phone call,
Just call and say, "I love you"
Sometimes you can fix something by just knowing someone,
Just call and say you know Butler
Sometimes you can fix something by cooking it longer,
Well done, attaboy!
Sometimes you can fix something by just whipping it out,
Them good looks, they don't matter
Sometimes you can fix something with a soft, gentle kiss,
Tame the wild best inside her
Sometimes you can fix something by causing a commotion,
Chaos is an answer
12 couplets contributed by Claudia Chopek and New Retro Strings featuring Ward White:
sometimes you can fix something by failing to arrive
absence makes the heart grow fonder
sometimes you can fix something by just waking away
but then you always have to wonder
sometimes you can fix something with a brutal show of force
riot gear, tear gas and batons
sometimes you can fix something with democracy
but committee thinking gives us sitcoms
sometimes you can fix something by not taking your pill
it’s a safety net: medication
sometimes you can fix something by taking all the pills
nothing quite so dull as desperation
sometimes you can fix something by just being born
another screaming mouth. awh who’ll feed them?
sometimes you can fix something by passing away
the stupid with no blind to lead them
sometimes you can fix something by yanking the tooth
well he’s a dentist, not a doctor
sometimes you can fix something by letting it decay
keep it hid behind a locked door
sometimes you can fix something by burning it to the ground
well, a phoenix rose up from the ashes
sometimes you can fix something by losing what you found
that bird could be a monster if it hatches
14 couplets contributed by Maiku:
Sometimes you can fix something by giving it one more try,
You might just get it right this time
Sometimes you can fix something by admitting you don't know,
Lack of intelligence is not a crime
Sometimes you can fix something by being in the scene,
Go out there and make some new friends
Sometimes you can fix something by just apologising,
Go make some peace and make amends
Sometimes you can fix something by going out and exploring,
You never know what you will find
Sometimes you can fix something by ripping off Jeff Lynne,
"You got me running, going out of my mind"
Sometimes you can fix something by Sometimes you can fix something by,
Sometimes you can fix something by repetition
Sometimes you can fix something by getting something to eat,
No need to die from malnutrition
Sometimes you can fix something by not believing the BS,
Let them know that you know they are a liar
Sometimes you can fix something by dissing the haters,
Rhubarb rhubarb can go die in a fire
Sometimes you can fix something by a little backmasking,
Rhubarb rhubarb rhubarb rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something by a little free verse,
Rhyming that last line is too difficult
Sometimes you can fix something by practising your moonwalk,
Pay your homage to the King of Pop
Sometimes you can fix something by pressing your luck,
No rhubarb, no rhubarb, STOP!
8 couplets contributed by The Swales:
Sometimes you can fix something by just laying it down,
Did you ever really need the hassle?
Sometimes you can fix something by just letting it go,
There's the moat now Darling, where's the castle?
Sometimes you can fix something by just clearing the air,
Don't matter how you feel
Sometimes you can fix something by just shrugging it off,
Rhubarb rhubarb rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something by just having a cake,
Did you ever want to eat it too?
Sometimes you can fix something by just taking a nap,
Close my eyes and show me what to do
Sometimes you can fix something by just saying, "I quit",
Do you always have to push right through?
Sometimes you can fix something by just saying, "I do",
Rhubarb rhubarb rhubarb
46 couplets contributed by Don Libby:
sometimes you can fix something by
by just turning it on
sometimes you can fix something by
just turning it off
sometimes you can fix something by
just calling a pro
sometimes you can fix something by
just letting it go
sometimes you can fix something by
just waggin your tail
sometimes you can fix something
with a hammer and nail
sometimes you can fix something
with a drop of glue
sometimes you can fix something
if you use the right tool
sometimes you can fix something by
just yankin the chain
sometimes you can fix something by
just using your brain
sometimes you can fix something by
hook or by crook
sometimes you can fix something by
just taking a look
sometimes you can fix something by
reading the directions
sometimes you can fix something by
making some corrections
sometimes you can fix something
with a modification
sometimes you can fix something by
taking a vacation
sometimes you can fix something by
flippin the circuit breaker
sometimes you can fix something by
cruisin to Jamaica
sometimes you can fix something
with deep inhalation
sometimes you can fix something
with positive vibration
sometimes you can fix something by
giving it your all
sometimes you can fix something by
doing nothing at all
sometimes you can fix something
till you got to say "hang it"
sometimes you can fix something by
just shouting "dang it"
sometimes you can fix something by
just smilin wide
sometimes you can fix something
with a rider by your side
sometimes you can fix something by
going out on a limb
sometimes you can fix something by
by taking a swim
sometimes you can fix something by
just shinin a light
sometimes you can fix something
in the middle of the night
sometimes you can fix something
with a breath of fresh air
sometimes you can fix something by
just leaving it there
sometimes you can fix something
with a microwave oven
sometimes you can fix something
with some good lovin
sometimes you can fix something by
just lovin it more
sometimes you can fix something by
just being a bore
sometimes you can fix something
with some extra lubrication
sometimes you can fix something
with some intoxication
sometimes you can fix something by
just getting it on
sometimes you can fix something by
going till its gone
sometimes you can fix something by
calling all your friends
sometimes you can fix something by
just pitching in
sometimes you can fix something
with your imagination
sometimes you can fix something
with a dog in the station
sometimes you can fix something by
just turning it on
sometimes you can fix something by
just turning it off
17 couplets contributed by Jim Turner:
Sometimes you can fix something by riding on a road,
Get out a hot rod engine and you got a heavy load
Sometimes you can walk something and fix it on the street,
You can feel that sidewalk coming up and it talks your beat
Sometimes you can fix something by climbing up a tree,
Climbing up through the sensitive trembling leaves, you and me
Sometimes you can fix something by getting on that couch,
Talking to that psychiatrist I said, "I got problems that'll make you say ouch"
Sometimes you can fix something by going down to the store,
I have a lot of conversations with people down there and that's why I want to go back some more
Sometimes you can fix something by touching yourself just right,
Gotta touch myself and I wanna touch you with me tonight
Sometimes you can fix something by taking that wrench up and turn,
Man, I got the heavy load in the hammer now and rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something by getting out on the floor,
I wanna jump around with the lights turned down crying, "More!" "More!" "More!"
Sometimes you can fix something by bumping to the beat,
Gotta get in touch with that primordial zone from your head down to your feet
Sometimes you can fix something by just letting go,
Gotta say I've got a hot-rod motor, got a heavy load
Sometimes you can fix something by going, "Ah, ah-ah-ahhh!",
Sometimes you can fix something by going, "Oh, oh-oohhh!"
Sometimes you can fix something by just breathing deep,
Feel the rhythm coursing from you from your bottom to your feet
Sometimes you can fix something by getting out, going fast,
Downshift this thing Baby, turning left, going down to the last
Sometimes you can fix something by riding in a train,
I've been all over the country, Baby, and IU don't think I'll be back again
Sometimes you can fix something by meditating real deep,
Found that connection to that place where I was deep in my sleep
Sometimes you can fix something when you're driving in your car,
Just like Bob Dylan said, you could be playing your cigar
Sometimes you can fix something by being the boss rhubarb,
That's when Jemes Brown pull it up rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something by breaking a couple of twigs,
Put 'em in this here recording studio and rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something by just letting go,
I'm mainly known for the things I never say and don't even know
25 couplets contributed by Mars Williams:
sometimes you can fix something by just buying the beer
get to know your new companions
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a trip
the greatest place on earth is Iceland
sometimes you can fix something by just spinning your wheels
sometimes the thing to do is nothing
sometimes you can fix something by just spinning your wheels
heat 'em up for better traction
sometimes you can fix something by just oiling your wheels
a little grease reduces friction
sometimes you can fix something by just trusting yourself
listen to your intuition
sometimes you can fix something with just a tin can
a West Virginia exhaust system
sometimes you can fix something by just pulling that switch
justice is served by execution
sometimes you can fix something by just drawing the line
there is a limit to your patience
sometimes you can fix something with just the right phrase
come up with a catchy slogan
sometimes you can fix something by just changing one word
that's how a thought becomes a poem
sometimes you can fix something by just buying some time
let things settle down some
sometimes you can fix something by just being crude
dirty jokes help male bonding
sometimes you can fix something by just pulling some strings
set things into motion
sometimes you can fix something by just having the clout
the juice to get the job done
sometimes you can fix something by just pulling rank
declare an end to the discussion
sometimes you can fix something by just giving 'em lip
there's power in sarcasm
sometimes you can fix something by just showing respect
if they deserve it, give 'em some
sometimes you can fix something by just flipping 'em the bird
tho that invites retaliation
sometimes you can fix something with just a little paint
cover up those imperfections
sometimes you can fix something by putting throwing the baby out with the bathwater
a cliché's okay if it's a good one
sometimes you can fix something with just a good excuse
say you were kidnapped by Martians
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a vote
settle on a course of action
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a poll
but rig it with tricky questions
sometimes you can fix something by just carrying a spare
crucial gear often malfunctions
12 couplets contributed by Tyler Zahnke:
Sometimes you can fix something by watching a 3D movie,
You'll say, "I can't believe it!"
Sometimes you can fix something just by givine out a loud shriek,
just like rhubarb rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something just by checking your e-mail,
Hope you don't get any spam
Sometimes you can fix something by eating some lunch meat,
Baloney, turkey or ham
Sometimes you can fix something just by learning how to program,
html or javascript
Sometimes you can listen to ambient music,
See for yourself rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something just by sampling tapes,
Just like rhubarb rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something by larking around vocally,
Like a big-time fool-o
Sometimes you can fix something just by eating dessert,
A pie, a cookie or a cake
Sometimes you can fix something just by eating some meat,
In the form of plain or shake'n'bake
Sometimes you can fix something just by listening to heavy metal,
Make sure it doesn't blow your ears out
Sometimes you can fix something just by listening to classical music,
when you put the lights out
12 couplets contributed by General Gary Jackett:
Sometimes you can fix something by
by takin' out the trash
Sometimes you can fix something by
scratching' that old rash
Sometimes you can fix something by finding'
your old stash
Sometimes you can fix something by
throwing' a party bash
Sometimes you can fix something by
smoking' all your hash
Sometimes you can fix something by
burnin' it down to ash
Sometimes you can fix something by
avoiding a crash
Sometimes you can fix something by
breaking with a smash
Sometimes you can fix something by
instigating a clash
Sometimes you can fix something by
whipping' with a sash
Sometimes you can fix something by
growing' a mustache
Sometimes you can fix something by
trying' to make a splash
Sometimes you can fix something by
playing' guitar with Slash
Sometimes you can fix something
with heavy metal thrash
Sometimes you can fix something by
doin' not a thing
17 couplets contributed by Keith Allison:
Sometimes you can fix something by playing chess with Death
not going gentle into that good night
Sometimes you can fix something by playing an LP
You know that vinyl sounds much better
Sometimes you can fix something by making a pot of tea
With milk or lemon to complete it
Sometimes you can fix something by just using the click track
No need to keep the count in your head
Sometimes you can fix something by quoting Oscar Wilde,
"There is no sin except stupidity"
Sometimes you can fix something by losing your way,
That's when the unexpected happens
Sometimes you can fix something by getting a Brand New Bag,
Just like the Godfather of Soul did
Sometimes you can fix something by not holding back,
Throwing all caution to the winds
Sometimes you can fix something by just hanging back,
Let someone else stand in the spotlight
Sometimes you can fix something by talking in blank verse
Make life a tragedy by Shakespeare
Sometimes you can fix something by sleeping in the day,
Go out all night and paint the town red
Sometimes you can fix something by working like Joe Meek,
Record the drummer in the bathroom
Sometimes you can fix something by just turning it off,
Then switch it right back on again
Sometimes you can fix something by waiting 'till they're relaxed,
Set up a false sense of security
Sometimes you can fix something by talking like a pirate
Don't let them think that you're a bilge rat
Sometimes you can fix something by trying to be the best
Play the guitar like Richard Thompson
Sometimes you can fix something by talking like Michael Caine
"You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!"
0 couplets contributed by THE DOUBLE WIDE FOOT LONG:
The problem is the busting out to find the bitch in heat
The problem is the humping of every leg the fucker meets
The problem is the primal instinct pissing on the walls
Sometimes you can fix something by cutting off his balls
Sometimes he's a-cryin', sometimes he just moans
Sometimes I assume the dude's just gnawing on his bone
But then it gets too quiet and I'm seeing what is what
Sometimes you can fix something by cutting off his nuts
You wake up in the morning and the screen is ripped to shreds
And everybody's sleeping but he's not in his bed
Incriminating evidence on all the neighbor's yards
You know, sometimes you can fix something by snipping off his nards
20 couplets contributed by Keith Allison:
Sometimes you can fix something by listening to the Ginger Geezer,
Explore the canyons of your mind, old chap
Sometimes you can fix something by burning down the house,
But just make sure you have insurance
Sometimes you can fix something by playing Blonde on Blonde,
Sooner or later one of us must know
Sometimes you can fix something by just cutting a rug,
Step up and trip the light fantastic
Sometimes you can fix something by just opening your mind,
Just make sure that your brains don't fall out
Sometimes you can fix something by just changing your name,
Give yourself the name you've always wanted
Sometimes you can fix something by just looking the part,
All dressed up and nowhere to go
Sometimes you can fix something by barking up the wrong tree,
The answer's where you least expect it
Sometimes you can fix something by just biting the bullet,
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger
Sometimes you can fix something by playing like Billy Ficca,
Move to the beat of a different drummer
Sometimes you can fix something by jumping on the bandwagon,
Pretend you liked them before they were famous
Sometimes you can fix something by just looking before you leap,
Make sure the ground is still beneath you
Sometimes you can fix something by just using sleight of hand,
Also called prestidigitation
Sometimes you can fix something by keeping your sense of proportion,
Don't make a mountain from a mole hill
Sometimes you can fix something by just taking charge,
Just say, "It's my way or the highway"
Sometimes you can fix something by just reading between the lines,
Work out what they are really saying
Sometimes you can fix something by just fine tuning,
No need to reinvent the wheel, there
Sometimes you can fix something by running it up the flagpole,
Stand back and see who salutes it
Sometimes you can fix something by shaking hands with the wife's best friend,
Go to the bathroom in Australia
Sometimes you can fix something by taking your mind off it,
You know a watched pot never boils
10 couplets contributed by Mike iLL:
Sometimes ya can fix something by
Just making a list
Sometimes ya can fix something by
Looking at the list
Sometimes ya can fix something by
Just ignoring it
Sometimes ya can fix something by singing everything that's on it
Preceded by the words, "sometimes you can fix something by".
Sometimes you can fix somethings by accepting that it's broken
'Supposed to have your kids making each other scream
Sometimes ya can fix somethings by
Just going to school
Sometimes ya can fix somethings by
Not having a reason why
Sometimes ya can fix somethings by
Just letting them scream
Sometimes ya can fix somethings by
Just being a bug
Sometimes ya can fix somethings by... by... by
Singin' bye 'n' bye
3 couplets contributed by johnBfree:
Sometimes you can fix something using WikiLeaks
You might even get to be President
Sometimes you can fix something by saying crazy shit
Putting people in a frenzy
Sometimes you can fix something by getting in its way
Just don’t call it obstruction
Sometimes you can fix something by working with your friend
Just don’t call it collusion
Sometimes you can fix something but just moving on
But they might call you a coward
Sometimes you can fix something by holding your ground
Putting it all on your shoulders
Sometimes you can fix something by using sworn enemies
Let them do all the digging
Sometimes you can fix something by blowing something up
But it will leave your ears ringing
14 couplets contributed by Gary Pig Gold with John Huelbig:
Sometimes you can fix something on just the first try,
People will think that you're a magician
Sometimes you can fix something by just cracking the whip,
C'mon, get with the programme
Sometimes you can fix something by just sitting by a lake,
Restin peaceful meditation
Sometimes you can fix something by just making a fist,
There is a time for aggression
Sometimes you can fix something by just knowing the way,
To your final destination
Sometimes you can fix something by just making your move,
After careful preparation
Sometimes you can fix something by just knowing what's what,
It's all in rhubarb rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something by just having some style,
An eye for a tasteful decoration
Sometimes you can fix something by just going too far,
Over-the-top exaggeration
Sometimes you can fix something by just kerbing your dog,
Shit on the sidewalk's just disgusting
Sometimes you can fix something by just being a sneak,
Become a matter of deception
Sometimes you can fix something by not having the best,
Too much of a good thing...
Sometimes you can fix something by just saying, "No thanks,
I decline the nomination"
Sometimes you can fix something with just Vitamine,
They say it's good for the complexion
0 couplets contributed by Dusty Wright:
Glitch glitch glitch glitch
Glitch glitch glitch glitch
1 couplets contributed by Harvey Gold:
Sometimes you can fix csomething by simply outlasting
Cowboys can't die while on their feet
lean on a tree and just keep-on-standing
Can't die if you just don't go to sleep
Sometimes you can fix something by keeping your pants on
No baby mamas made today
No slip, no slide, no deal, no ride, no mess to fix now
Pants up, buttoned down and walk away: FAST!
Sometimes you can fix something by stopping this nonsense
Go make love to your wife
Cleans all puts all in the past tense
Just go out and get a life!!
Sometimes you can fix something by (just) running for Congress
Lawmakers get so much done
Legislate the problems caucus up let's be honest
You'll still be in bed by a quarter o' one.
Sometimes you can fix something by knocking yourself senseless
Blink blink as all the layers unpeel
Sometimes you can fix something by painting your body
Goldie Hawn MEANT 'Sock it to Me.'
Sometimes you can fix something by eating some fruit!
Regularityâs a good thing
Sometimes you can fix something by trimming a hedge
Topiary art is so soothing.
Sometimes you can fix something by robbing a nun
Increase your power courting Satan
Sometimes you can fix something by dreamin' the dream'
Get the girl and wind up naked.
Sometimes you can fix something by eating at Swenson's
Forbes FYI would never lie
Sometimes you can fix something by becoming a Vet!
Our furry friends are our allies
Sometimes you can fix something by going on a vacation
1 week ain't nearly long enough
Sometimes you can fix something by just keeping your door shut
Isolationism Rocks!
Sometimes you can fix something by resoling your shoes
Makes you feel smart and ready
Sometimes you can fix something by getting a tan
A little color seems so healthy
Sometimes you can fix something by just visiting Gramma
Her form of guilt is so persuasive
Sometimes you can fix something by just going to Lowe's
Tool always settled dad
Sometimes you can fix something by simply rewinding
Undoing all that you can't see
Walk backwards, keep your eye on what hasn't happened
Just try to stay on your feet
Sometimes you can fix something by just dialing it up
Crabby friends notwithstanding
Sometimes you can fix something by just changing your clothes
Presenting more than inner beauty
Sometimes you can fix something by just changing a flat
Keep it moving forward motion
Sometimes you can fix something by just grooming your hair
Do your best to be attractive
Sometimes you can fix something with earnest conviction
Grit gets you half way there
Sometimes you can fix something by hatin' on your neighbor
Vitriolâs the treat that can't be beat.
Sometimes you can fix something by just bearing witness
Christianity's got tenure
Sometimes you can fix something by just building a barn
A little agrarian nostalgia
Sometimes you can fix something by just looking up!
Anticipate Invasions
Sometimes you can fix something by just selling your house
Can't beat a clean getaway.
Sometimes you can fix something by just being just
Liberty is always balanced
Sometimes you can fix something by eating a sub
Good nutrition is overrated
Sometimes you can fix something by just penciling in
Working up a few ideas
32 couplets contributed by SmartBunny:
sometimes you can fix something by just breaking a plate
ceramic deconstruction
sometimes you can fix something by just tempting fate
are you truly up the junction?
sometimes you can fix something by just placing a bet
if the ace is in your pocket
sometimes you can fix something by just pressing re-set
is the plug firmly in the socket?
sometimes you can fix something by just calling a vet
we'll need a stool sample
sometimes you can fix something by just vetting a set
Ooh! I like the pink one.
sometimes you can fix something by just etching a sketch
good luck with those diagonals
sometimes you can fix something by just kvetching a stretch
quit your stitch and bitching
sometimes you can fix something by just felting your gelt
Yo, who's got my sheckels?
sometimes you can fix something by just gelding yourself
now where'd I put those pliers?
sometimes you can fix something by just diving a muff
tuna predilection
sometimes you can fix something by just fermenting the duff
mmm, single malt scotch whiskey
sometimes you can fix something by just drinking the stuff
estrogen filled soy latte
sometimes you can fix something by just thinking of guff
not another word, young lady!
sometimes you can fix something by just rounding a curve
love my cordless router
sometimes you can fix something by just loving the Pounce
Meow Mix is for suckers
sometimes you can fix something by just watching it bounce
two sports bras could help that
sometimes you can fix something by just mouthing the count
confound those pesky numbers
sometimes you can fix something by just pimping it out
I like Chelsea's new hairdo
sometimes you can fix something by just surpressing your doubts
somatically delicious
sometimes you can fix something by just airing it out
visit Dr. Judy
sometimes you can fix something by just baring your clout
speak softly, but carry a big stick
sometimes you can fix something by just limping with gout
who's the rich man now, Falstaff?
sometimes you can fix something by just working the pout
works better for the ladies
sometimes you can fix something by just pulling a pint
Guinness counts as food
sometimes you can fix something by just fudging your lines
only Shakespeare will notice
sometimes you can fix something by just kludging your kit
homebuilts are so nerdy
sometimes you can fix something by just sleeping a bit
another forty winks
sometimes you can fix something by just grabbing your tits
SO NOT breast obsessed
sometimes you can fix something by just writing a tune
Guinness Book of Records
sometimes you can fix something by just by just wondering what
and why and who and how
sometimes you can fix something by just fixing it
other times it stays broken
29 couplets contributed by Violet Ray:
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing what ya want
don't suffer fools, morons or cretins
sometimes you can fix something by just getting dressed
nudity gets boring
sometimes you can fix something by just hurting yourself
some people thrive on self-destruction
sometimes you can fix something by just camping out
build a fire, climb a mountain
sometimes you can fix something by just takin' a hike
turn in your resignation
sometimes you can fix something by just spraying the pots
resistance rises with corrosion
sometimes you can fix something by just being cool
quote Negroponte or McCluen
sometimes you can fix something by just being cool
like Ray Milland or Robert Mitchum
sometimes you can fix something by just being cool
like Combustible Edison
sometimes you can fix something by just being real cool
like William Powell in "The Thin Man"
sometimes you can fix something by just being outta the loop
that way they can't say that you're lying
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "I can't"
ya gotta know your limitations
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "I am"
tho don't expect someone to listen
sometimes you can fix something by just looking back
revive some retro tradition
sometimes you can fix something by just looking ahead
stick to your game plan
sometimes you can fix something by just getting mad
so what's your fucking problem?
sometimes you can fix something by just changing your tie
sharpen up your presentation
sometimes you can fix something by just being a slob
protest the fascism of fashion
sometimes you can fix something by just selling out
life has its Faustian bargains
sometimes you can fix something by just wearing a rug
tho who do you think you're fooling?
sometimes you can fix something by just watching the clock
over-achievers are a nuisance
sometimes you can fix something by just being fast and bulbous
also tapered, that's right, Captain
sometimes you can fix something by just being blue
maybe they'll ban ya in Boston
sometimes you can fix something by just singing the blues
like Howlin' Wolf, not Eric Clapton
sometimes you can fix something by just singing the blues
but what the hell is "Smoke Stack Lightning"?
sometimes you can fix something by just changing your strings
be sure to check your intonation
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a tip
eavesdrop on a conversation
sometimes you can fix something by just making M.A.S.H.
make a fortune on the re-runs
sometimes you can fix something by just wanting it now
instant gratification
23 couplets contributed by The Cucumbers:
Sometimes you can fix something by just taking a walk
No need for conversation
Sometimes you can fix something by dreaming with a friend
Cosmic creative contemplation
Sometimes you can fix something by getting it wet
Changing the physical sensation
Sometimes you can fix something by building it up
With a bit of glue and duct tape
You can fix something...
Sometimes you can fix something by admitting it's a joke
Even if it's not so very funny
Sometimes you can fix something by admitting that it's broke
And you're the one who broke it
Sometimes you can fix something by admitting you're unaware
And you're swimming in an ocean
Sometimes you can fix something by admitting that you care
It might be your greatest notion
You can fix something...
Sometimes you can fix something by just being a friend
Sitting back and listening
Sometimes you can fix something by making it end
Start a new beginning...
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can fix something...
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can break something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can make something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can try something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can fry something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can buy something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can give something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can live something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can kiss something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can miss something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can know something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can show something
Sometimes you can fix something by
You can fix something...
28 couplets contributed by Michael Baker:
sometimes you can fix something by just twisting an arm
a little gentle convincing
sometimes you can fix something by just sharing the chores
i'll wash, if you'll do the drying
sometimes you can fix something by just caring a lot
attack your problem with a passion
sometimes you can fix something by just being a square
all squeaky clean and wholesome
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a massage
work the stress out of your system
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "what if?"
tickle your imagination
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "so what?"
maintain that spirit of rebellion
sometimes you can fix something by just not paying your rent
make the landlord fix the plumbin'
sometimes you can fix something by just squashing it hard
full compression, no depression
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a second job
earn a little extra income
sometimes you can fix something by just being wry
ironic juxtaposition
sometimes you can fix something by just getting it fixed
who needs this aggravation?
sometimes you can fix something by just splitting for the Coast
there's something magic 'bout the ocean
sometimes you can fix something by just getting sick
you might get cool hallucinations
sometimes you can fix something with something out of the blue
epiphanies and revelations
sometimes you can fix something by just throwing a pie
basic goofball entertainment
sometimes you can fix something by just sharing your pain
bore the world with your hurting
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "I'm sorry"
hope for some kind of absolution
sometimes you can fix something by just paying with cash
that's the way dodge the taxman
sometimes you can fix something by just parking your dough
in a bank in the Cayman Islands
sometimes you can fix something with just a running gag
that always worked for Monty Python
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing what to expect
like the Spanish Inquisition
sometimes you can fix something by just taking some speed
then cram for your examination
sometimes you can fix something by just slowing down
wait a minute, keep your shirt on
sometimes you can fix something by just being a dump
like most of Staten Island
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "fuck you"
America's real national anthem
sometimes you can fix something by just being the same
have lots of things in common
sometimes you can fix something by just changing yourself
with a nose job or liposuction
sometimes you can fix something by just changing real fast
adapt or face extinction
2 couplets contributed by Bill Janoff:
Sometimes you can fix something by just doing nothing
You just gotta let it go
Sometimes you can fix something by doing nothing at all
You just gotta sit back and go with the flow
4 couplets contributed by Chris Karl Butler:
sometimes you can fix somethings by just adding it up
it's numerology
sometimes you can fix somethings by just looking through walls
by viewing it remotely
sometimes you can fix somethings by just making it rain
you can influence the weather
sometimes you can fix somethings by just looking away
shadows in your sidelong vision
15 couplets contributed by Ed Seifert:
Sometimes you can fix something by just painting it black,
Just like the Rolling Stones did
Sometimes you can fix something by cutting each other some slack,
Treat 'em like they were you own kid
Sometimes you can fix something by just casting a vote,
For a proud and grateful nation
Sometimes you can fix something by just calling your dad,
He'll get you the nomination
Sometimes you can fix something by adding up some sums,
That might solve all your conumdrums
Sometimes you can fix something by banging on a drum,
Say "Hello" to Todd Rundgren
Sometimes you can fix something by just changing the beat,
And find yourself some syncopation
Sometimes you can fix something by just dragging your feet,
And exhibit hesitation
Sometimes you can fix something by asking, "What would Jesus do?",
And accept your crucifixion
Sometimes you can fix something by asking, "What would Elvis do?"
And shoot a hole in your television
Sometimes you can fix something by just swinging rhubarb,
And stick it to that cocky Russian
Sometimes you can fix something by not hitting your head,
And that's how you avoid concussions
Sometimes you can fix something by just making ends meet,
Rhubarb rhubarb Madonna
Sometimes you can fix something by finding a new spot,
Rhubarb rhubarb rhubarb orange
Sometimes you can fix something by just admitting there's not
Any word that rhymes with orange
15 couplets contributed by MISSILE TOE:
Sometimes you can fix something by saying “Merry Christmas”
And “Happy New Year”
Sometimes you can fix something by rockin’ out with Missile Toe
Hung where you can see
Sometimes you can fix something with tinsel and garland
On an aluminum tree
Sometimes you can fix something with cards and presents
Sugar plum fairy dreams
Sometimes you can fix something by dashing through the snow
In a one-horse open sleigh
Sometimes you can fix something by o're the fields we go
Laughing all the way
Sometimes you can fix something by making cookies with Grandma
Decorating the tree
Sometimes you can fix something with a letter to Santa
Wish list fantasy
Sometimes you can fix something by singing like an angel in a choir
With reindeer socks
Sometimes you can fix something by setting fire to the Yule log
With a hot cup of cocoa
Sometimes you can fix something by building a snowman
On a bright Winter day
Sometimes you can fix something by throwing a snowball
And running away
Sometimes you can fix something by jumping on Rosebud
Sledding down a hill
Sometimes you can fix something by wassailing in the early night
Underneath a star and Christmas lights
Sometimes you can fix something with a candy cane, the songs you sing
Joy to the world you bring
Sometimes you can fix something with 12 drummers drumming
And 5 golden rings
19 couplets contributed by SuperEdwardR:
Sometimes you can fix something by singing into a microphone
Let the world hear your projection
Sometimes you can fix something by playing the same two chords
A good technique is repetition
Sometimes you can fix something by not playing the same two chords
Allow a variation
Sometimes you can fix something by just starting to jam
Improvisation
Oh damn, what now?
This I won't allow
The band is off key today.
The keyboard is not decent
The singing is unpleasant
And the guitarist doesn't know how to play.
I have a solution
The perfect sell
With computer magic and Auto Tune
Yeah, it's not genuine
But what the hell
The band will sound professional soon.
Sometimes you can fix something by just going home
Return to your objective
Sometimes you can fix something by not going home
Who needs to be overprotective?
Sometimes you can fix something by having a good time
Just go out and have some fun
Sometimes you can’t fix something by having a good time
You gotta learn to get some work done.
Sometimes you can fix something by not using lyrics from the Devil Glitch
We want to hear some new ones
Sometimes you can fix something by not adding weak material
Use your imagination
Sometimes you can fix something by deleting System32
You just screwed up your system!
Sometimes you can fix something by just being Chris Butler
Guitarist, songwriter, musician
Sometimes you can fix something by just writing a song
Musical production
Sometimes you can fix something by hiring a team of songwriters
Seriously, I can't write compositions
Sometimes you can fix something by just getting your emails
A response to your question
Sometimes you can’t fix something by not getting your emails
That’s very disappointing
Sometimes you can fix something by setting up a website
You'll have lots of welcome invitations
Sometimes you can fix something by creating the Major Glitch
A project that involves participation
Sometimes you can fix something by just shutting it down
Sorry, we’re under construction
Sometimes you can fix something by getting to the end
Come to a conclusion.
0 couplets contributed by Captain Celeste Dorage:
Sometimes you can fix something by:
-Listening to the radio
- laughing at the blues
-making sure that no one‘s hungry
-sitting on a barstool
-looking for Integrity
-instead of fixing you
-listening with an open heart
-looking in her eyes
-leaving others by the wayside
-using super glue!
-knocking on the door
-laying on the floor
Sometimes, sometimes, sometimes, sometimes, sometimes, sometimes, sometimes, sometimes,
you just can’t fix
You just can’t fix
You just can’t fix
Something something something something something something something something
Scat out…… On something……
26 couplets contributed by The Know-It-All Boyfriends:
sometimes you can fix something by not changing a thing
just redesign the carton
sometimes you can fix something by just playing some golf
get buddy-buddy with the big guns
sometimes you can fix something by just traveling light
rid yourself of your possessions
sometimes you can fix something by just being a king
declare it fixed by proclamation
sometimes you can fix something with coffee and cigarettes
the real breakfast of champions
sometimes you can fix something by just learning how to swim
pretend that you are Esther Williams
sometimes you can fix something by just stealin' a boat
then seek political asylum
sometimes you can fix something by just splitting hairs
point out the subtle distinctions
sometimes you can fix something by just being right
without fear of contradiction
sometimes you can fix something by not being too right
avoid self-righteous indignation
sometimes you can fix something by just staying awake
or you might miss something
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a nap
the elves will fix it while you're sleeping
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "hi"
greetings and salutations
sometimes you can fix something by just being lost
you'll go off in new directions
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing the Mob
sometimes it helps to be Sicilian
sometimes you can fix something by just closing-up shop
put up a sign that says "gone fishing"
sometimes you can fix something by just picking up the tab
snow 'em with a lavish luncheon
sometimes you can fix something by just doing good work
you've earned that adulation
sometimes you can fix something by just being known
someone who needs no introduction
sometimes you can fix something by just being a star
tho not like Norma Desmond
sometimes you can fix something by just being clean
and above all suspicion
sometimes you can fix something by just filling your plate
help yourself, go back for seconds
sometimes you can fix something by just being a whore
there're many kinds of prostitution
sometimes you can fix something with eeny-meeny-miney-mo
the process of elimination
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing who was there
guilty by association
sometimes you can fix something by with AT and F1 enter
reinitialize your modem
39 couplets contributed by Fear of Falling:
sometimes you can fix something by just being a spy
launch a covert operation
sometimes you can fix something by ordering a probe
a blue ribbon investigation
sometimes you can fix something by just saving the earth
how can we stand all this pollution?
sometimes you can fix something by checking the SCSI i.d.
you might need termination
sometimes you can fix something by just being a bitch
some men need lots of training
sometimes you can fix something by just building a bridge
try to form a coalition
sometimes you can fix something by just drying it out
shorts are caused by condensation
sometimes you can fix something by just starting from the top
get it right with more rehearsing
sometimes you can fix something by just explaining it again
aim for clarification
sometimes you can fix something by just making a switch
try a clever substitution
sometimes you can fix something by believing in ghosts
witchcraft and divination
sometimes you can fix something by just seeing a ghost
that gimmick always worked for Dickens
sometimes you can fix something by just doing the right thing
ethics matter in the long run
sometimes you can fix something by finally seeing the light
but watch out for deathbed conversions
sometimes you can fix something by just dragging your butt
keep 'em waiting, keep 'em wait-in'
sometimes you can fix something by just shaking things up
a total reorganization
sometimes you can fix something by just being strong
some jobs require heavy lifting
sometimes you can fix something by just being thin
like Twiggy or Tony Perkins
sometimes you can fix something by just being fat
like Greenstreet in "The Maltese Falcon"
sometimes you can fix something by just being real
...versus imitation
sometimes you can fix something by just being a fake
invent your qualifications
sometimes you can fix something by just being a quack
you still might have a gift for healing
sometimes you can fix something by just being a fraud
look what that did for P T Barnum
sometimes you can fix something by just playing God
genetic manipulation
sometimes you can fix something by just losing your voice
|that hasn't hurt Bob Dylan
sometimes you can fix something by just being rare
tho you'll wind up in a museum
sometimes you can fix something by just buying a ton
some things are cheaper by the dozen
sometimes you can fix something by just bending the rules
cut 'em some slack, make an exception
sometimes you can fix something by just being there
there's nothing better than good timing
sometimes you can fix something by not being there
an alibi that can't be shaken
sometimes you can fix something by just having some spunk
over-come all tribulations
sometimes you can fix something by just playing on the one and three
how come white folks feel that rhythm?
sometimes you can fix something by just wanting it all
either/or are bad conjunctions
sometimes you can fix something by being right-brained
and good at pattern recognition
sometimes you can fix something by being left-brained
focused linear thinkin'
sometimes you can fix something by just swinging that club
sometimes ya gotta be a caveman
sometimes you can fix something by just being unique
defy categorization
sometimes you can fix something by just blending in
observe all local customs
sometimes you can fix something by just fading away
lose yourself in oblivion
9 couplets contributed by Pamela Beth Grossman:
Sometimes you can fix something by just leaving it be,
Accept the imperfections
Sometimes you can fix something by just setting it free,
Let it run in all directions
Sometimes you can fix something by just taking the bridge,
Dammit, the tunnel's always a mess
Sometimes you can fix something by just cleaning the fridge,
What's the smell? Stop trying to guess
Sometimes you can fix something by just handing out doughnuts,
Even if it doesn't work you still have doughnuts
Sometimes you can fix something by just going to yoga,
And focusing on your breathing
Sometimes you can fix something by just ceasing to care,
It never helps to keep feeling
Sometimes you can fix something by just numbing your gums,
Especially if you're a baby who's teething
Sometimes you can fix something by just setting it down,
It's not your job to fix everything....
3 couplets contributed by R. Stevie Moore:
Sometimes you can break something by just being a prick
Winning by intimidation.
Sometimes you can break something by just lifting your skirt
Look out for the tortoise.
Carry on, carry on
Sometimes you can break something by just putting your hand out
Look into the dictionary
12 couplets contributed by The Parkway Charlies:
Sometimes you can fix something by packing it away
And take that trunk down to the station
Sometimes you can fix something by waging a big war
We need a little conflagration
Sometimes you can fix something by looking through that glass
I fell in love with that distortion
Sometimes you can fix something by switching off the news
Roll with a little self-absorption
Sometimes you can fix something by slowing it down
Quaaludes, 1977
Sometimes you can fix something by sitting in a pew
But that is someone else’s heaven
Sometimes you can fix something by editing yourself
Go back on all your punctuation
Sometimes you can fix something by drowning it in wine
You know I go for that libation
Sometimes you can fix something by doing it in the road
Did Paul and Linda really go there?
Sometimes you can fix something by staying in your bed
I’d let you down if I had the hair
Sometimes you can fix something by taking a blue pill
Who wants a seven-hour erection?
Sometimes you can fix something by voting from your grave
Let’s hope they’re throwing that election
32 couplets contributed by BRAD BOLTON:
Sometimes you can fix something by having a meltdown
I want a patty meltdown
Sometimes you can fix something by not doing nothing
Now that would really be something
Sometimes you can fix something by running away
Just be sure it doesn’t follow
Sometimes you can fix something by calling the mouse king
He would just think you’re nuts
Sometimes you can fix something
without even thinking
Sometimes you can fix something
without even drinking
Sometimes you can fix something
just try winking
Sometimes you can fix something
without even blinking
Sometimes you can fix something by
giving a nod
Sometimes you can fix something by
carrying a hod
Sometimes you can fix something by
showing your elation
Sometimes you can fix something by
blind adulation
Sometimes you can fix something
with teen infatuation
Sometimes you can fix something
with righteous indignation
Sometimes you can fix something
through trial and tribulation
Sometimes you can fix something
with a screaming angry nation
Sometimes you can fix something by being an a-hole
But you can’t fix nothin in this shithole country
Sometimes you can fix something by turning it over
over easy over easy ovaries
Sometimes you can fix something while you’re still alive
But it’s easier when you’re dead
Sometimes you can fix something
before you awake
Sometimes you can fix something
but then it’s too late
Sometimes you can fix something
by playing in the mud
Sometimes you can fix something
just talk like Elmer Fudd
Sometimes you can fix something by
wanting to screw 2 x 4s, together
Sometimes you can fix something by driving a car
just remember - stay out of baaars! (no texting no texting no texting)
Sometimes you can fix something that’s already fixed
do it over and over and over and over (fade into next line)
Sometimes you can fix something by watching Fox News
But I ain’t ever seen that happen
Sometimes you can fix something, we’ll fix it in the mix
Especially if we’re making muffins
Sometimes you can fix something by changing baby’s diaper
It’s so easy if you use a windshield wiper
Sometimes you can fix something by blaming someone else
But first you have to hide all the mirrors
Sometimes you can fix something by eating all your veggies
Just hide your cake and eat it, too
Sometimes you can fix something if it’s not too late
But you can crastinate, just like a pro.
Sometimes you can fix something if it ever stops
But this thing never does, it’s time to call the cops
7 couplets contributed by Joe Howell:
Sometimes you can fix something by
looking at it differently, look at it from this side
Sometimes you can fix something by
holding up a family from your inside
Sometimes you can fix something by
having day dreams on a car ride, looking cross-eyed
Sometimes you can fix something
falling asleep, but it's easier to die
Sometimes you can fix something
calling the shots
lift up the hood, hand me the tool
gotta think hard, gotta look cool
Sometimes you can fix something
by making it up
11 couplets contributed by PATRICK CULLIE:
Sometimes you can fix something
With chewing gum and spit.
Sometimes you can fix something
By just ignoring it.
Sometimes you can fix something
And fix that sucker good.
Sometimes you can fix something
But that don’t mean you should.
Sometimes you can fix something
Some times you should not.
Sometimes you can fix something
With just a simple knot.
Sometimes you can fix something
If you have the tool.
Sometimes you can fix something
And look the perfect fool.
Sometimes you can fix something
With hammer and a nail.
Sometimes you can fix something
But sometimes you might fail.
Sometimes you can fix something
If you’re that kind of bloke,
But sometimes you can fix something
That isn’t really broke.
31 couplets contributed by Liam Sternberg:
sometimes you can fix something by just never growing up
damn right the world owes you a living
sometimes you can fix something by just being ashamed
guilt's a valid motivation
sometimes you can fix something by just blaming the world
avoid all introspection
sometimes you can fix something by just making a choice
after weighing all your options
sometimes you can fix something with a mnemonic device
an aide to memorization
sometimes you can fix something with just a slap on the wrist
constructive criticism
sometimes you can fix something by just getting spanked
young man, I hope you've learned your lesson
sometimes you can fix something by just making a stink
blow things way out of proportion
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a Mac
DOS is such a lousy system
sometimes you can fix something by just moving out
try a trial separation
sometimes you can fix something by just trying to hide
"nobody here but us chickens"
sometimes you can fix something by just fixin' it in the mix
tho that is lazy production
sometimes you can fix something by just screaming "shut up"
now stop all of this bitchin'
sometimes you can fix something by just introducing yourself
make a good first impression
sometimes you can fix something by just blowing some smoke
the ancient art of obfuscation
sometimes you can fix something by just hiring a flack
improve your public relations
sometimes you can fix something by just being a crook
even Nixon got a pardon
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a shot
update all your vaccinations
sometimes you can fix something by just being upbeat
brimming with enthusiasm
sometimes you can fix something by just feeling doomed
sit back and wait for Armageddon
sometimes you can fix something by just faking your death
skip out on your obligations
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a life
everybody needs a mission
sometimes you can fix something by just looking it up
ask your local librarian
sometimes you can fix something by just looking it up
let your fingers do the walking
sometimes you can fix something by listening to NPR
especially Morning Edition
sometimes you can fix something by just losing your shirt
bankruptcy means a new beginning
sometimes you can fix something by just going to work
fill out that job application
sometimes you can fix something by just watching Fox
The X-Files or The Simpsons
sometimes you can fix something by just watching The Tick
the best thing on Saturday morning
sometimes you can fix something by just writing a note
give ‘em a good recommendation
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a look
learn by careful observation
13 couplets contributed by CB - Radio Station ID Break:
SOMETIMES YOU CAN FIX SOMETHING BY JUST GIVING YOUR LEGAL ID
WE PAUSE FOR STATION IDENTIFICATION…
sometimes you can fix something by being a good boss
not one of those modern venal strivers
sometimes you can fix something by just being dependent
on the kindness of strangers
sometimes you can fix something by getting your PhD.
tho that won’t help ya flipping burgers
sometimes you can fix something by just making that call
you might already be a winner
sometimes you can fix something by just being a thief
lots of art's appropriation
sometimes you can fix something by just saying it's art
the essence of Duchampism
sometimes you can fix something by just being a thief
lots of good ideas are stolen
sometimes you can fix something by just getting caught
then go thru rehabilitation
sometimes you can fix something by just learning to type
have a skill you can fall back on
sometimes you can fix something by not learning to type
who needs carpal tunnel syndrome?
sometimes you can fix something with just more oomph
zizz-up the schmutz with zotz and gookum
sometimes you can fix something with still more oomph
just get yourself a bigger engine
4 couplets contributed by Malcolm Marsden:
Sometimes you can fix something with a paper and pen,
But please don't bring your lawyer
Sometimes you can fix something by conniving with friends,
And pulling a Tom Sawyer
Sometimes you can fix something by kissing a ring,
But you'll incur some obligations
Sometimes you can fix something by, oh...making it up,
Call the United Nations
20 couplets contributed by The Quarter Cleveland Trio:
Sometimes you can fix something by writing it in cursive
So at least the line looks elegant
Sometimes you can fix something and sometimes you can't
Tigers shouldn't try to ride elephants
Sometimes you can fix something by total disassembly
And break it again once it's back together
Sometimes you can fix something by pulling out your hair in large tufts
But not baldness
Sometimes you can fix something by trying to look cool
But not vanity
Sometimes you can fix something by developing a scientific cure
More than you can by monetizing it
Sometimes you can fix something by remembering the correct bid
Damnit! What do I bid here?
Sometimes you can fix something just by dreaming of something else
That step back can really make things clear
Sometimes you can fix something before it fixes you
So keep your ears to the ground and look around too
Sometimes you can fix something by breeding out iffy traits
For a nicer set of pearly whites and sprightlier gaits
Sometimes you can fix something before they run the race
Unless old Hard Hoof loses a shoe and comes in last place
Sometimes you can fix something by running from the bookie
Unless he runs into you and rearranges your face
Sometimes you can fix something with a Q-tip and alcohol
But don't eat them in that order
Sometimes you can fix something just by taking it to The Guy
Thank god there's The Guy
Sometimes you can fix something when the rights parts finally arrive
Where the hell is UPS??
Sometimes you can fix something by putting an egg back in its nest
That legend about the tainted human scent is total B.S.
Sometimes you can fix something just by wishing and praying hard enough
Just kidding
Sometimes you can fix something by just being just
Liberty is always balanced
Sometimes you can fix something by eating a sub
Good nutrition’s overrated
Sometimes you can fix something by just penciling in
Working up a few ideas
27 couplets contributed by Bob Gaulke:
sometimes you can fix something by just saying you're wrong
even when you don't mean it
sometimes you can fix something by doing yoga
getting close to sweaty women
sometimes you can fix something by talking to the dog
walking doesn't solve the problem
sometimes you can fix something Skype-ing with your mom
for a nicer set of problems
sometimes you can fix something by just passing out
rebooting all major functions
sometimes you can fix something by eating Brussels sprouts
there's quality of life in Belgium
sometimes you can fix something by paying for lunch
those sprouts were expensive
sometimes you can fix something by just showing up
your presence makes an impact
sometimes you can fix something by moving out of town
pulling a minor geographic
sometimes you can fix something burning in the sun
shriveling up like bacon
sometimes you can fix something freezing in the dark
cheap flights to Iceland
sometimes you can fix something curled in a ball
take the fetal position
sometimes you can fix something riding the bus
context is everything
sometimes you can fix something getting very lost
in a foreign country
sometimes you can fix something by ignoring the cost
money doesn't change anything
Sometimes you can fix something by just running away
making up the explanation
Sometimes you can fix something by shooting at the stars
burning up the "B" plan
Sometimes you can fix something by falling out of love
seeing other trees in the forest
Sometimes you can fix something by soaking in the tub
Scrubbing at sticky objects
Sometimes you can fix something by staying where you are
Going with the worlds rotation
Sometimes you can fix something by taking the subway
avoiding all surface tension
Sometimes you can fix something by reading history
getting context for your problems
Sometimes you can fix something with Indian poetry
a.k. Ramanujan in particular
Sometimes you can fix something by declaring victory
don't you know we gotta war on
Sometimes you can fix something by savoring defeat
humility makes us human
Sometimes you can fix something by sleeping with a snake
it's nice under a heat lamp
Sometimes you can fix something by embracing what you hate
karma comes in flavors of instant
26 couplets contributed by The Whatnots:
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a pill
then call me in the morning
sometimes you can fix something by just making a roux
that's how I once saved Thanksgiving
sometimes you can fix something by just dropping a bomb
teach the bastards a lesson
sometimes you can fix something by just throwing a fit
ventilate all your frustrations
sometimes you can fix something by just eating some meat
protein's a part of good nutrition
sometimes you can fix something by just eating some meat
vegetarians are boring
sometimes you can fix something by not eating some meat
cow farts are ruining the ozone
sometimes you can fix something by just getting a break
just be ready when it happens
sometimes you can fix something by just sitting still
wait for that flash of inspiration
sometimes you can fix something by just sitting real still
they call that "playing possum"
sometimes you can fix something by going to the source
some things get lost in the translation
sometimes you can fix something by just making a link
that's called concatenation
sometimes you can fix something by just being strange
beyond all classification
sometimes you can fix something by just branching out
if you can get good distribution
sometimes you can fix something by just hitting Control-S
computers are always crashing
sometimes you can fix something by just finding a mate
there's nothing like a good companion
sometimes you can fix something by just being alone
ya always seem to get more work done
sometimes you can fix something by just having a kid
then move to Montclair from Hoboken
sometimes you can fix something by just throwing it away
clutter's an anal compulsion
sometimes you can fix something by giving it away
we're now accepting donations
sometimes you can fix something by just eating some corn
clean out your colon
sometimes you can fix something by just turning the page
find out who was the villain
sometimes you can fix something by just picking yourself up
and get back in the runnin'
sometimes you can fix something by just making a few tweaks
subtle modifications
sometimes you can fix something by not getting it fixed
maybe you got stuck with a lemon
sometimes you can fix something by just getting old
just outlive your competition
27 couplets contributed by Matt Hickey:
Sometimes you can fix something by
choosing a side, the only side
Sometimes you can fix something by
acknowledging there's no detente with this connection
Sometimes you can fix something by
noting the energy moving in one direction
Sometimes you can fix something by
passing the parcel, especially if it's ticking
Sometimes you can fix something by
telling me that it's another
Sometimes you can fix something by
believing any day can be fantastic
Sometimes you can fix something by
being heather-bound in the grass
Sometimes you can fix something by
not going so merrily against it
Sometimes you can fix something by
meeting the hour when we depart
Sometimes you can fix something by
with every single being wilting away
Sometimes you can fix something by
watching time run while we wait
Sometimes you can fix something by
just leaving it with you
Sometimes you can fix something by
figuring out how to make the bear go away
Sometimes you can fix something by
looking in the shadows on the shelf
Sometimes you can fix something by
solitude which belies in a dream
Sometimes you can fix something by
with yesteryear's snow and the green of spring
Sometimes you can fix something by
evoking the smell of tobacco and hairspray
Sometimes you can fix something by
with the promises of a post-war world
Sometimes you can fix something by
turning plastics into telephones
Sometimes you can fix something by
greeting men in suits with crystal cut glasses
Sometimes you can fix something by
hearing jetliners filtered through the lobby
Sometimes you can fix something by
shifting a gaze, and then it's gone
Sometimes you can fix something by
illuminating particles in the air
Sometimes you can fix something by
a wig demanding the gallery to stand
Sometimes you can fix something by
placing oaks in a forest of stone
Sometimes you can fix something by
echoing words of law passing into history
Sometimes you can fix something by
penning a visual which pales to this tally
17 couplets contributed by DUTCH BABIES:
Sometimes you can fix something by
Listening to Nirvana, or maybe moving to Florida
Sometimes you can fix something by
Bringing back the scientist, or quite likely climbing Mt. Everest
Sometimes you can fix something by
Justifiable homicide, a page from the Little Book of Mormon
Sometimes you can fix something
Like a thoroughbred racehorse, you can win money, his name is Secretariat
Sometimes you can fix something
With silver bullets and werewolves, a solid shiny nugget – the Cult of Accountability
Sometimes you can fix something by
Tossing it all in the well 2 hell, nothing ever comes back from there to tell
Sometimes you can fix something by
The hardest way possible, this is called waterproof mascara
Sometimes you can fix something
With candy and flowers, I love you, yes I do – swoon
Sometimes you can fix something by
Declaring there’s no problem, Hey, look, I’m moving away from failure
Sometimes you can fix something by
Smiling hugs – How you been?, good to see you – so good
Sometimes you can fix something by
Wearing mascara, don’t let that guy-liner scare you
Sometimes you can fix something by
Dropping trou, dance around with no pants
Sometimes you can fix something
With chocolate and flowers, I love you, yes I do
Sometimes you can fix something by
Declaring there’s no problem, everything’s perfect today
Sometimes you can fix something by
Moving on from failure, Midas Touch on the run
Sometimes you can fix something
With a fishtail parka, 18 below zero today
Sometimes you can fix something
With a short text message stating the facts, who, what, where and why
30 couplets contributed by Team Philpott:
Sometimes you can fix something by looking at that crack
And thinking I will use no plaster
I have none in the house and so I will attack
This fissure with some tape it's faster
Sometimes you can fix something by make do and mend
And kid yourself you'll do it better (but later)
you then forget and only realize it when
That hole has now became a crater
Sometimes you can fix something by kidding yourselves
That that is just the paint that's peeling
You get that tester pot and think that it's fine
Till rain is flooding through the ceiling
Sometimes you can fix something by saying ''that'll do''
Can't do it properly too much trouble
I'll use some paste .. instead of good glue
Reduce my palace into rubble
Sometimes you can fix something by hearing that noise
And turning up the CD player
And it's OK until the black smoke appears
And you stranded out in nowhere
Sometimes you can fix something by putting it off
And hoping it can’t get much worse
And all is fine until that rattling cough
It almost puts you in a hearse
Sometimes you can fix something by a tactical vote
To stop the others getting in
Congratulations when you’’re just about afloat
But tidal waves are happening
Sometimes you can fix something by turning to Class A’s
And all your worries put on hold
You’ll be amazing interesting and blase
While problems mount ten thousandfold
Sometimes you can fix something by taking a crash course
A Surgeon’s job without the effort
But dig the scalpel in the wrong place using force
And you may find the wrong bit severed
Sometimes you can fix something by thread instead of rope
Surely a justified replacement
And when you step out you can only walk and hope
Your shoes do not end up on the pavement
Sometimes you can fix something by pretending it won’t end
Like binge watching loads of Seinfeld
And when you realize there is no season 10
Your sadness is all the more heartfelt
Sometimes you can fix something by learning to drive
To save you all hassle walking
And though to destinations quicker you arrive
Pedestrians don’t pay for parking
Sometimes you can fix something by streaming films online
For your leisurely enjoyment
Not using pirate sites your laptop will be fine
For that is copyright infringement
Sometimes you can fix something by listening to Kiss
But If I may talk freely
I much prefer the stuff with Peter Criss
Or the guitarist Ace,,,,err….um no it’s gone
Sometimes you can fix something by crystal meth
But there’s the risk you’ll go to jail
The best you’ll get is rotten breath
You’re better off with Crystal Gayle
Sometimes you can fix something by going on a cruise
It can erase all sense of panic
Until the ice berg they can’t swerve comes into view
You find you’re on the new Titanic
Sometimes you can fix something by retail therapy
It’s like Buddhism in reverse
But I would much prefer an empty property
Than opening an empty purse
Sometimes you can fix something by Photoshop
You’ll be a younger looking version
But that illusion will be set to stop
When you are close-up and in person
Sometimes you can fix something by household chores
For this removes all mess and spillage
For some this stimulates for others it bores
We clean while playing some Steve Hillage
Sometimes you can fix something by going to Stonehenge
And channeling your inner hippie
You can find inner peace but I’d rather go to Penge
I hear they have a brilliant chippy
Sometimes you can fix something by playing some guitar
They say it’s cure all therapy
But only if there is no whiplash from strings stretched far
When 2 steps up in Open G
Sometimes you can fix something by patching that tire
Although I must say at this juncture
That any piercing caused by a vampire
Is quite another kind of puncture
Sometimes you can fix something by nails and hammer
Ideally during carpentry
It does not work so well in every manner
Like bouncy castles or pottery
Sometimes you can fix something by needle and thread
Especially dresses socks and jeans
But if you fall and if you split your head
You should avoid sewing machines
0 couplets contributed by Bob Waltz:
Sometimes you can fix something by fixing it twice
then give up altogether
Sometimes you can fix something by going fishing
Sometimes you just need to fish
Sometimes you can fix something by leaving it alone
Everything will work if you let it
Sometimes you can fix something in your dreams
Let your brain do all the work
Sometimes you can fix something by using a lamp cord
Tied neatly around your neck
Sometimes you can fix something with a bottle of beer
Or three or five or seven
Sometimes you can fix something by ignoring it
Maybe it will go away
Sometimes you can fix something with 3 lbs of nails
You get to pound the shit out of something
Sometimes you can fix something by climbing the walls
Be sure to bring a ladder
Sometimes you can fix something by staring it in the face
But not a gorilla
Sometimes you can fix something by Driving around
In some one else's car
Sometimes you can fix something by pissing in the wind
Be sure to bring an umbrella
Sometimes you can fix something by killing the messenger
It was probably bad news anyway
Sometimes you can fix something by just being there
No one ever stays present
Sometimes you can fix something by listening to the wind
I heard the answers in their a'blowin
Sometimes you can fix something by going to sea
All rivers and streams lead there
Sometimes you can fix something with a banjo string
A lot of strength for it's size
Sometimes you can fix something by climbing inside
Hard to judge something by it's cover
Sometimes you can fix something by saying hello
Nice to meet cha'
Sometimes you can fix something by taking it apart
And then just put it back together
Sometimes you can fix something by smacking it twice
Or dropping it on the floor
Sometimes you can fix something by fixing yourself
Turns out it was you that was broken
8 couplets contributed by Chris Bradley:
sometimes you can fix something by just walking away
leave it for investigation
sometimes you can fix something by just tiring it
soak it up and feel exhaustion
sometimes you can fix something by just going around
stay clear of limitations
sometimes you can fix something by just closing your eyes
just meditation
sometimes you can fix something by just going to town
go around forcing jugulaton
sometimes you can fix something by just going to hell
bitch for can fuck shim megalation
sometimes you can fix something by just filling a void
everyone needs some validation
sometimes you can fix something by just drinking a beer
to make the most of fermentation
0 couplets contributed by JASON BEERS:
Sometimes you can take 10 years between writing lyrics and finally recording it. Ha.
99 couplets contributed by Oblique Orchestra:
Sometimes you can fix something by not wanting to fix it
Abandon all desire
Sometimes you can fix something by just taking a detour
Eschew normal instructions
Sometimes you can fix something by getting an opinion
It's advice, not losing power
Sometimes you can fix something with a little something extra
A little bit of magic
Sometimes you can fix something by being less linear
Have two sides, after all
Sometimes you can fix something by retracing your steps...
that first step in particular
Sometimes you can fix something by convincing the unconvinced
to work against their better judgement
Sometimes you can fix something by just asking your body
Your temperature is the decider
Sometimes you can fix something by just dropping the soap
Don't be afraid of being dirty
Sometimes you can fix something by just going all out
Extravagance may be in order
Sometimes you can fix something by just mellowing out
Less criticism, more acceptance
Sometimes you can fix something by pretending you're a bellows
Breathe deep, then push all the air out
Sometimes you can fix something by just burning a bridge
You'll wonder why you even built it
Sometimes you can fix something by... Just zooming in
Change ambiguities to specifics
Sometimes you can fix something by just not fixing it
Keep on doing what you were doing
Sometimes you can fix something by... Just zooming out
Change specifics to ambiguities
Sometimes you can fix something by checking the synapses
Answers may be in the transitions
Sometimes you can fix something by just being brave
Coooooooooouraaaaaaaaaaaaage!
Sometimes you can fix something by letting cats bite wires
Cut off an important connection
Sometimes you can fix something by just hanging some drapes...
If you hate it, decorate it
Sometimes you can fix something leaving things intact,
or destroying what's important.
Sometimes you can fix something by cutting loose the old saws
Discard those cherished axioms
Sometimes you can fix something by just saying yes...
to some controlled self-indulgence
Sometimes you can fix something by ditching your old tricks
Find your formulas, and then lose them
Sometimes you can fix something by...Singing out, Louise!
Don't be afraid to show your talent
[Display your talent]
Sometimes you can fix something by being Dr. Who
Think of time as something bendy.
Sometimes you can fix something by grabbing the the low-hanging fruit
Don't avoid what is easy
Sometimes you can fix something by just being inert
Do nothing for as long as possible
Sometimes you can fix something by... Just playing dead
Don't break the silence
Sometimes you can fix something by not picking a side
Don't stress one thing more than another
Sometimes you can fix something with utter simplicity
Boring is the new black!
Sometimes you can fix something by going off the deep end
Do something sudden, destructive, and unpredictable
Sometimes you can fix something by going right to the end
Do the last thing as the first thing
Sometimes you can fix something by forgetting about the music
Is it the words that need the fixing?
Sometimes you can fix something by turning up the contrast
Emphasize the things that differ
Sometimes you can fix something by highlighting the problems
Warts show personality!
Sometimes you can fix something by doing it like Deiter
Don't choose; do both together
Sometimes you can fix something by just tying it down
Use a safe part as an anchor
Sometimes you can fix something by just showing your hand
Go ahead...give the game away
Sometimes you can fix something by going to the dark side
Give way to your worst impulse
Sometimes you can fix something by just going outside
And let the door hit you on the way out
Sometimes you can fix something by going to extremes,
then coming halfway back to normal.
Sometimes you can fix something by just asking yourself,
how would someone else approach this?
Sometimes you can fix something by asking someone else,
how would you have done it?
Sometimes you can fix something with total darkness,
or in a large room very quietly.
Sometimes you can fix something by just stepping back
Holy shit, maybe it's finished!
Sometimes you can fix something by just looking for holes
Think about what might be missing.
Sometimes you can fix something by just being Tim Gunn
Is that style really working?
Sometimes you can fix something by just applying yourself
Elbow grease make a good frosting
Sometimes you can fix something by just carrying on
I mean keep going, not throw a tantrum
Sometimes you can fix something just mellowing out
Let your quiet voice speak loudest
Sometimes you can fix something by shaking up your sequence
Maybe you order's not in order
Sometimes you can fix something by highlighting the hell
Focus on what you don't want to
Sometimes you can fix something with soft lights and Barry White
Expose the sensuality
Sometimes you can fix something by throwing on some dirt
Humanness is next to godliness
Sometimes you can fix something setting your sights lower
Work on what seems unimportant
Sometimes you can fix something by not building a wall
Just make a brick instead
Sometimes you can fix something by just starting your search
Once you do, you will find something
Sometimes you can fix something by looking at the micro
The macro can be overwhelming
Sometimes you can fix something by just picking one element
and fixing that one thing throughout
Sometimes you can fix something by just toeing the line
Be a champion of inertia
Sometimes you can fix something by just leaving it blank
Emptiness can equal substance
Sometimes you can fix something by knocking down your idols
Question the heroic
Sometimes you can fix something by just closing your eyes
and remembering quiet evenings
Sometimes you can fix something just by opening up
Try removing that restriction
Sometimes you can fix something by doing it ad nauseum
The repetition could transform it
Sometimes you can fix something by retracing your steps
They call that walking back the kitty
Sometimes you can fix something by just turning around
Back out of your mental driveway
Sometimes you can fix something by just making it less
Simple second grade subtraction
Sometimes you can fix something by taxiing the runway
Slow preparation, fast execution
Sometimes you can fix something by just saying what's wrong
Read aloud the error message
Sometimes you can fix something by just sitting one out
You can always dance more later
Sometimes you can fix something by clearing the out the big stuff
Take away what seems important
Sometimes you can fix something by being inconsistent
Create some tension, some texture
Sometimes you can fix something by looking in the corners
What you forgot could be important
Sometimes you can fix something by staring down the problem,
then finding inspiration elsewhere
Sometimes you can fix something by just tidying up
The answer might be in the junk pile.
Sometimes you can fix something by just pretending to fix it
You might just fake it and unbreak it
Sometimes you can fix something by just looking for change
Turn it upside down and shake it
Sometimes you can fix something by recycling in your head
Pull an idea out of mothballs
Sometimes you can fix something by just being obvious
Cliches are famous for a reason
Sometimes you can fix something by getting to its essence
Filter out all the detritus
Sometimes you can fix something by just looking around
Use what's nearby as a model
Sometimes you can fix something by trusting raw talent
No qualifications needed
Sometimes you can fix something by not outsourcing
Why not use your own ideas?
Sometimes you can fix something by voicing your suspicions
Give in to paranoia
Sometimes you can fix something with a pond, a lake, an ocean
Reflect upon the water
Sometimes you can fix something by just changing the frame
A different context might improve things
Sometimes you can fix something by just dumbing it down
What's the simplest solution?
Sometimes you can fix something by just looking back
What mistakes did you make last time?
Sometimes you can fix something by tweaking the amounts
What to increase, reduce or maintain?
Sometimes you can fix something by just coming clean
Tell us what you were really thinking
Sometimes you can fix something by first figuring out
what it is you won't do
Sometimes you can fix something by just asking yourself,
what would my BFF do?
Sometimes you can fix something by just watching the clock (tick, tick!)
Nothing motivates like deadlines
Sometimes you can fix something by feeling for the edges
Keep going until you can't
Sometimes you can fix something by just making some groups
Some things may be like some others
Sometimes you can fix something by just slowing down,
or deciding to go faster...wheeeee!
Sometimes you can fix something by looking at it harshly
Would anyone even want this?
And sometimes you can fix something by using your mistakes
They may really be your intentions
6 couplets contributed by Chris Butler:
Refrain
sometimes you can fix something by just being a prick
winning by intimidation
sometimes you can fix something by just lifting your skirt
it's the ultimate distraction
V
i poke button
i want action
let's hear some gears and see some smoke
no dilly-dally
move your heiny
this is the age of "go for broke"
Refrain
sometimes you can fix something by just kissing some ass
if you don't mind humiliation
sometimes you can fix something by just smoking a pipe
academic contemplation
V2
so pathetic no mechanic
no steady eye, no magic touch
no screwdriver
ball peen hammer
mr. fix-it's gone to lunch
Extension 1
not personal?
yeah it's personal..
what did i ever do to you?
no crap from
contraptions
just do what i tell you to do
Refrain x 2
sometimes you can fix something by just blaming your mom
everybody loves a victim
sometimes you can fix something by just cracking a joke
humor is greasy lubrication
sometimes you can fix something by just cooking the books
wealth is all about perception
sometimes you can fix something by just smoking a joint
stoner free association
Solo
V3
broke down, lifeless
junkyard worthless
no tweezer jesus in the house
so desperate
so dependent
pay any price to dope it out
Extension2
i want genius
i wanna suss
the perfect kluge, the devil glitch
oh, hosanna
socket messiah
the only jesus worth a shit
0 couplets contributed by Ralph Carney - horns:
undecipherable!
12 couplets contributed by Chris Butler:
sometimes you can fix something by just smashing your car
the Keith Moon School of Wreckless Driving
sometimes you can fix something by just going ahead
surrender to temptation
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "hey?'
"who the hell gave you permission?"
sometimes you can fix something by just doing it anyway
over everyone's objections
sometimes you can fix something by just reading some smut
that'll get those juices flowing
sometimes you can fix something by just gutting it out
don't let go of your vision
sometimes you can fix something by just losing your nerve
reconsider what you're doin'
sometimes you can fix something by just havin' your doubts
maybe your idea's a dumb one
sometimes you can fix something by just plodding along
when you're way past the point of caring
sometimes you can fix something by just pulling the plug
cutting your losses shows wisdom
sometimes you can fix something by plugging back in
lick your wounds then come out swingin'
sometimes you can fix something by just being unplugged
your record will sell millions
25 couplets contributed by The Gefkens:
sometimes you can fix something by just deciding to die
thank you, Dr. Kevorkian
sometimes you can fix something by just having a dick
there's nothing wrong with being masculine
sometimes you can fix something by just asking a pro
some problems need a trained technician
sometimes you can fix something by just crossing your fingers
tho that's only a superstition
sometimes you can fix something by just being wrong
mea culpa, mea culpa
sometimes you can fix something by just startin' to chant
NOM MYOHO RENGE HARE KRISHNA
sometimes you can fix something by just going New Wave
get black jeans and a Farfisa
sometimes you can fix something by just having a shtick
like Liberace's candelabra
sometimes you can fix something by just taking the train
efficient public transportation
sometimes you can fix something on the L.I.R.R.
dream on, dream on, dream on
sometimes you can fix something by just joining a frat
become a Lion or a Mason
sometimes you can fix something by just polishing a turd
'til it shines like a diamond
sometimes you can fix something by just making a plan
organize your operation
sometimes you can fix something by just drinking some wine
loosen up your inhibitions
sometimes you can fix something by just being sweet
maintain a pleasant disposition
sometimes you can fix something by just being cruel
that's how horses are broken
sometimes you can fix something by just trying again
sometimes you win by being stubborn
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "oh well"
a feeble rationalization
sometimes you can fix something by just waving the flag
demagogic jingoism
sometimes you can fix something by just being numb
anesthetize your real feelings
sometimes you can fix something by just blasting away
'til you run out of ammunition
sometimes you can fix something by just studying Bird
solo with upper extensions
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing the chords
A B minor D eleven
sometimes you can fix something by just courting the rich
it really helps to have a patron
sometimes you can fix something by just being rich
poverty is not fun
sometimes you can fix something by just being rich
a Gen X Trust-a-farian
89 couplets contributed by Verne Davis:
Sometimes you can fix something by building a machine
A mean machine to start world domination
Sometimes you can fix something by just eating a peach
The Allman Brothers help cure constipation
Sometimes you can fix something by cutting your band in half
And giving yourself more room for stage gyration
Sometimes you can fix something by putting up yellow tape
Protect the crime scene from contamination
Sometimes you can fix something by banging on a tree
But only in a Sasquatch habitation
Sometimes you can fix something by eating some beef jerky
And rousing up some Sasquatch irritation
Sometimes you can fix something by reading Sigmund Freud
And learning about the future of illusion
Sometimes you can fix something by quoting Sigmund Freud
A cigar says nothing about your protrusion
Sometimes you can fix something by just fetching a stick
When it’s dog-eat-dog a perfect occupation
Sometimes you can fix something by just calling in sick
Keep them guessing about your dedication
Sometimes you can fix something by just fixing a thing
Ain’t no need for crass specification
Sometimes you can fix something by just naming a thing
Some call it nominalization
Sometimes you can fix something by just taking a bath
Some lowly form of self-purification
Sometimes you can fix something by just skinning a cat
BeBop fans are into mutilation
Sometimes you can get fix something by getting a new tattoo
A drunken choice can show your dedication
Sometimes you can fix something by turning to channel two
And Get some gifts for making a donation
Sometimes you can fix something by just wearing a shirt
Slogans are a pure communication
Sometimes you can fix something by just drinking some wort
A brewer’s joke for your edification [Look it up!]
Sometimes you can fix something by just spinning your wheels
A gravel shower will get all their attention
Sometimes you can fix something by just cooling your heels
Give yourself some after-school detention
Sometimes you can fix something by stealing a good riff
Thumb your nose at legal litigation
Sometimes you can fix something by being a knif
And bastardize the real pronunciation
Sometimes you can fix something by being locked up in jail
A good defense in case of accusation
Sometimes you can fix something by getting out on bail
And avoiding any further penetration
Sometimes you can fix something by just being crude
But blame it on a lack of medication
Sometimes you can fix something by just being booed
And avoid all forms of pointless adulation
Sometimes you can fix something by throwing in your hat
As long as you don’t want the nomination
Sometimes you can fix something by just saying you’re fat
Admit your body’s an abomination
Sometimes you can fix something by going back to school
Make your mother proud at graduation
Sometimes you can fix something by stopping being cool
And being part of that de-evolution
Sometimes you can fix something by being too obscure
So join in the post-modern revolution
Sometimes you can fix something by just being a fool
And lowering all senseless expectations
Sometimes you can fix something by making a new rule
Like no stuttering while singing My Generation
Sometimes you can fix something by spanking your own ass
I don’t know why it’s just my own perversion
Sometimes you can fix something by just being an ass
And doing odd things to create a diversion
Sometimes you can fix something by not going on-line
Facebook can become a sad obsession
Sometimes you can fix something by just going on line
And selling all your most precious possessions
Sometimes you can fix something by just having a smoke
And bothering people with your self-destruction
Sometimes you can fix something by joining in a joke
And hoping you make the cut in the production
Sometimes you can fix something by just growing old
But not that cheerleader infatuation
Sometimes you can fix something by doing what you’re told
Restraining orders help resist cheerleader infatuation
Sometimes you can fix something by talking to yourself
But hope you don’t have a self-obsession
Sometimes you fix something by gaining a lot of wealth
A jet ski is a cure for most depression
Sometimes you can fix something by just getting ‘er done
Sleeveless shirts and ball cap fascination
Sometimes you can fix something by being number one
And showing your foam finger digitation
Sometimes you can fix something by eating your head
As long as you have proper marination
Sometimes you can fix something by eating all the dead
Geneva would love that strict regulation
Sometimes you can fix something by growing your own food
Though Organic is a silly designation
Sometimes you fix something by growing you own brood
Though nothing’s worse than reckless procreation
Sometimes you can fix something by writing a good line
But moon in June just lacks imagination
Sometimes you can fix something by just taking your time
Ignore all insults of procrastination
Sometimes you can fix something by just repeating a line
But moon in June just lacks imagination
Sometimes you can fix something by just repeating a line
Redundancy can prove imagination
Sometimes you fix something by just chanting a chant
And slip into a mystic transformation
Sometimes you can fix something by reading Emmanuel Kant
Though those Germans seemed to hate the Jewish nation
Sometimes you can fix something by wearing a spandex suit
A simple form of body modification
Sometimes you can fix something just taking a toot
Cocaine helped Californication
Sometimes you can fix something by just giving a hoot
Pollution is a global degradation
Sometimes you can fix something by taking off your pants
Randy Newman is a fucking genius
Sometimes you can fix something by just refusing to rhyme
Randy Newman is still a fucking genius
Sometimes you can fix something by turning your clocks back
Though DST is such a pointless mission
Sometimes you can fix something by just shutting up
Since DST is such a firm tradition
Sometime you can fix something by carrying all the weight
The world upon your shoulders shows conviction
Sometimes you can fix something by giving in to hate
And buying in to paranoid prediction
Sometimes you can fix something by blessing all the meek
The world will be their promised inheritance
Sometimes you fix something by acting like a geek
A chicken’s head will be make up your sustenance
Sometimes you can fix something by striking up a flame
Encores now will only need a cell phone
Sometimes you can fix something by taking on the blame
Nothing good will ever involve a cell phone
Sometimes you can fix something by driving in your car
Your mileage will predict your destination
Sometimes you can fix something by sleeping in your car
Some people claim it’s their habitation
Sometimes you can fix something by doing it in the road
The truth will help advance your reputation
Sometimes you can fix something by taking it all slow
Unless like me you hate blues-ification
Sometimes you can fix something by staying in 4/4
And saying no to cliché syncopation
Sometimes you can fix something by just seeing a shrink
And getting over all your sad fixations
Sometimes you can fix something by having another think
Why was Freud obsessed with cigars?
Sometimes you can fix something by coming to the end
Admit it’s just a fictionalization
Sometimes you can fix something by seriousing-up your voice
And waiting for some form of validation
Sometimes you fix something by just making a fist
Remembering the Kent assassinations
Sometimes you can fix something by reading off a list
Like all the 9/11 commemorations
Sometimes you can fix something by crying yourself to sleep
And hope you find sort of absolution
Sometimes you can fix something by pampering yourself
Pay attention to your morning abalutions
Sometime you can fix something by sitting on a fence
And hope that gravity will give direction
Sometimes you can fix something by shouting out a name
And hope that name will call up past affections
Sometimes you can fix something by just reading a book
I recommend Swami Vivekanda
Sometimes you can fix something by just getting a pet
Though I don’t recommend an anaconda
Sometimes you can fix something by looking out the window
Write a song without participation
Sometimes you can fix something by locking all your doors
But only if you’re hoping for stagnation
Sometimes you can fix something by staring at the wall
A blank screen can be an inspiration
Sometimes you can fix something by hearing the siren’s call
But only if you ignore their navigation
Sometimes you can fix something by saying enough’s enough
Like I’m saying now………….
25 couplets contributed by Krys O:
Sometimes you can fix something by just asking a question
mother nature doesn’t really care
Sometimes you can fix something by just being a goofball
mike nesmith had the wool hat
Sometimes you can fix something by just carrying a big stick
that’s the devil’s jukebox
Sometimes you can fix something by just dyeing your hair
oh, come on you’re worth it
Sometimes you can fix something by just eyeing the exit
just in case of emergency
Sometimes you can fix something by just forging a new bond
just hold on to the old ones
Sometimes you can fix something by just giving up
then you just start over
Sometimes you can fix something by just having a fit
you might end up with some money
Sometimes you can fix something by just ignoring the signs
if they’re in the wrong direction
Sometimes you can fix something by just jiving the blues
aw shucks it’s really easy
Sometimes you can fix something by just kicking the can
it can make you a kid again
Sometimes you can fix something by just live, larf and loaf
french frith Kaiser Thompson
Sometimes you can fix something by just making a proof
then you won’t risk a mistake
Sometimes you can fix something by just noodling a riff
it could come out a masterpiece
Sometimes you can fix something by just observing the horizon
you can get the big picture
Sometimes you can fix something by just pouring your heart out
see your problems shrinking
Sometimes you can fix something by just quizzing a quail
have fun with alliteration
Sometimes you can fix something by just rubbing the spot out
there’s no need to bleach it
Sometimes you can fix something by just saving it for later
let your subconscious work it out
Sometimes you can fix something by just taking a dive
it beats a bloody nose
Sometimes you can fix something by just uncovering the past
no need to hide anymore
Sometimes you can fix something by just venting your mind
better let some air in
Sometimes you can fix something by just washing the windows
be careful of the streaks though
Sometimes you can fix something by just x-ing out the bad words
like coulda shoulda woulda
Sometimes you can fix something by just yanking the chain
it could open up the right door
Sometimes you can fix something by just zeroing in on a detail
helps with comprehension
6 couplets contributed by Mike iLL:
Sometimes you can fix something by reducing the problem to an abstracted version of the problem, so you don't get distracted by details
Sometimes you can fix something by breaking the problem into multiple sub-problems, each far less insurmountable-seeming than the last.
Sometimes you can fix something by reading a book called The Nature Doctor
And supporting the disease in doing its healing as opposed to suppressing the symptoms.
Sometimes you can fix something by using a ton of fucking discipline
And not using words like fuck in your vocabulary unnecessarily.
Sometimes you can fix something by giving it attention in the middle of the night when aspects of life like the phone bill are sleeping.
Sometimes you can fix something by not being afraid of your own power
Feel that? The universe is offering it for a reason.
Sometimes you can fix something by just writing a letter
Whether or not you ever send it.
Sometimes you can fix something by not racially stereotyping
Not every Puerto Rican is a Jewish banker with a giant penis
Sometimes you can fix something by just going to bed
When the phone bill is starting to wonder if it's time for breakfast.
17 couplets contributed by Scott Anthony:
sometimes you can fix something by just tuning in
you never forget your first doctor
sometimes you can fix something by going to a police box
it just might be a tardis
sometimes you can fix something by calling in a dalek
prepare for extermination
sometimes you can fix something by getting an upgrade
prepare to have no emotions
sometimes you can fix something by using a dead-lock seal
it stops a sonic screwdriver
sometimes you can fix something by using a neural lance
be sure to change the settings
sometimes you can fix something by activating the Chameleon Arch
time to change your race
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a poll
which one of you is least important?
sometimes you can fix something bi-curious by trying it
it might not be the fit you feared
sometimes you can fix something by going back and reading the directions
which you should have done in the first place
sometimes you can fix something by letting it lie
problems have a way of solving
sometimes you can fix something by feeding it pi
no one likes a hungry apparition
sometimes you can fix something by asking your friends
and buying everyone a pizza
sometimes you can fix something by just ignoring it
and hoping it goes away
sometimes you can fix something by turning it off, then turning it on again
reboot the operation
sometimes you can fix something by just repeating the past
don't be afraid to look too stupid
sometimes you can fix something by just forgetting the past
because it's all about the future
5 couplets contributed by evA dilcuE:
Sometimes you can fix something by
not fixing anything, there's nothing to fix
Sometimes you can fix something by
not doing anything, just sit, breathe, be
Sometimes you can fix something by
being everything, and nothing
Sometimes you can fix something by
dissolving into nothing
Sometimes you can fix something by
being the change you want to see
Sometimes you can fix something by
the tale of who you bring, share yourself
18 couplets contributed by Ken Shimamoto:
Sometimes you can fix something by trying to do it all
But watch out, don't crash and burn
Sometimes you can fix something by doing nothing at all
A minimalist approach
Sometimes you can fix something by emulating Lou Reed
And playing football for the coach
Sometimes you can fix something by writing another verse
Make sure you've done an even number
Sometimes you can fix something by being early to lunch
Sitting by yourself outside on the deck
Sometimes you can fix something by being late to lunch
If the other guy likes grabbing the check
Sometimes you can fix something by running the other way
When you see some joker with a gun
Sometimes you can fix something by just counting to ten
It's more than nine but less than eleven
Sometimes you can fix something by just brushing your teeth
Proper dental hygiene is a good step
Sometimes you can fix something by just quitting your band
Unless you end up like Mick Taylor
Sometimes you can fix something by singing like Iggy Pop
Unless you think that would be no fun
Sometimes you can fix something by giving it all away
And asking for nothing in return
Sometimes you can fix something by just sailing a boat
It's sink or swim if you fall overboard
Sometimes you can fix something by just blowing you nose
To clear up nasal congestion
Sometimes you can fix something by just dropping a hint
Utilize the power of suggestion
Sometimes you can fix something by singing like Robert Smith
You might think that it's just like Heaven
Sometimes you can fix something by adopting a protégé
Teach them well to follow in your footsteps
Sometimes you can fix something by just riding a bike
But please take care of your derailleur
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a cat
Defer to our pointy-eared overlords
0 couplets contributed by DETER CLAWMUTE AND ZIPPO BRECKENRIDGE:
Sometimes you can fix something by throwing out a line
Sometimes you can fix something by bailing it like twine
Sometimes you can fix something by holding for yourself
Sometimes you can fix something by helping someone else
How long everybody going to wait in this line?
Sometimes you can fix something by being on time
Sometimes you can fix something by ‘ssembling all the parts
Sometimes you can fix something by fumble fits and starts
Sometimes you can fix something by standing on one leg
Sometimes you can fix something by scrambling an egg
All I need’s a dollar put some air in the tire
I’d use the credit card but it’s expired
Sometimes you can fix something by running through the hose
Sometimes you can fix something by blowing your own nose
Sometimes you can fix something by learning how to sneeze
Sometimes you can fix something by waiting for the breeze
I’ll leave the light on, I know you like it late
Won’t be no soda pop, I never could relate
Sometimes you can fix something by filling up a box
Sometimes you can fix something by pelting it with rocks
Sometimes you can fix something by standing in the sun
Sometimes you can fix something by stealing back my gun
Don’t forget to lie about your current situation
Sometimes you can fix something by taking a vacation
Sometimes you can fix something by taking off the lids
Sometimes you can fix something by steering into skids
Sometimes you can fix something by pretending you don’t know
Sometimes you can fix something by puttin’ on a show
Someday I’ll wander, comin’ back thru this town
Sometimes you can fix something by never bein’ found
4 couplets contributed by The Byzan Tones:
sometimes you can fix some thing by playing a buzuki
if you make the rhythm hard and the melody real spooky
you’ll learn the truth of which philosophers have spoken
stop trying to fix the world and learn to love it broken
sometimes you can fix something with your baghlama vaiki
and if you play real good, I’ll dance a zembegaiki
that is to dance where every step is your invention
and you honor your mistake as your hidden intention
16 couplets contributed by Kramer:
sometimes you can fix something by just holding court
like Dorothy Parker at the Algonquin
sometimes you can fix something if things just go right
no unexpected complications
sometimes you can fix something by just making a deal
enter in negotiations
sometimes you can fix something by just telling a shrink
your phobias and fixations
sometimes you can fix something by just staging a coup
a bloody act of liberation
sometimes you can fix something by just playing the long shot
tho that's a risky proposition
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing the odds
then make an accurate prediction
sometimes you can fix something by just hedging your bets
avoid a reckless speculation
sometimes you can fix something by just flipping a coin
heads you lose, tails I win
sometimes you can fix something by releasing it "as is"
de-bug it in a later version
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "I'll pass"
an act of self-preservation
sometimes you can fix something by just makin' it up
everything is fiction
sometimes you can fix something by just getting bought out
if they can meet your stipulations
sometimes you can fix something by just mnusy lkspek lknaoi
yeah...i gotta work on my diction
sometimes you can fix something by just dropping a beat
are you still listening?
sometimes you can fix something by playing on the roof
“Oi ‘ope we’ve passed the audition”
0 couplets contributed by Lane Steinberg:
I can't make too many of these out...can you?
19 couplets contributed by Maiku:
Sometimes you can fix something by giving it one more try,
I don't know what they say about the fourth time
Sometimes you can fix something by just being up front with it,
some of these lyrics aren't gonna rhyme
Sometimes you can fix something by going to a bar,
but only drink in moderation
Sometimes you can fix something by not going to a bar,
you're prone to inebriation
Sometimes you can fix something by going up an octave
and pretend that you are Sting
Sometimes you can fix something by just talking in a whisper, not
everyone needs to know everything
Sometimes you can fix something by not trying to sing,
plain talking is probably your best bet
Sometimes you can fix something by setting the record straight,
the song "Bitch" is by Meredith Brooks, not Alanis Morrisette
Sometimes you can fix something by just taking charge,
especially if you don't believe in fate
Sometimes you can fix something by patting yourself on the back, but
did I really help overturn Prop 8?
Sometimes you can fix something by hiding underground,
save yourself from the apocalypse
Sometimes you can fix something by staying above ground, all the
nutjobs and worrywarts are hiding now, let's celebrate!
Sometimes you can't fix something, so you just say "To hell with it!",
go buy a replacement
Sometimes you can fix something by striking out on your own, you don't
wanna live in your parent's basement
Sometimes you can fix something by just asking for help,
I wanna know what girls like, I wanna know what they want
Sometimes you can fix something by just being immature,
NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH, NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH!
Sometimes you can fix something by acting real mature,
know when it's time to get serious
Sometimes you can fix something by just trailing off,
because...well...um...delirious
Sometimes you can fix something by just sticking around,
you never know when you'll be needed
Sometimes you can fix something by not sticking around,
that's it, go on, beat it
0 couplets contributed by Ralph Carney - turkish:
None!
16 couplets contributed by Mick Hargreaves:
Sometimes you can fix something by turning it on
Please maintain a safe distance…
Sometimes you can fix something by shutting it off
Cool down that hot machine, boy
Sometimes you can fix something by hitting it hard
Please pass the persuasion tool
Sometimes you can fix something by doing nothing at all
Monitor the situation
Sometimes you can fix something by staying awake
You're gonna need some coffee…
Sometimes you can fix something by going to sleep
But then you lay awake all night…
Sometimes you can fix something by not being a flake
Ninety percent of life is showing up (Woody Allen)
Sometimes you can fix something by being total flake
Ninety percent of life is not showing up
Sometimes you can fix something by faking disinterest
That's passive-aggressive
Sometimes you can fix something by getting it used
Like at Salvation Armani
Sometimes you can fix something by thrown' in the towel
Please put it in the hamper, dear
Sometimes you can fix something by using ALL CAPS
Escalation is essential
Sometimes you can fix something by turning up the bass
That always works for bass players
Sometimes you can fix something by reversing the phase
Not just the phase you're going through
Sometimes you can fix something by asking the producer
I don't know, what do you think?
Sometimes you can fix something by adding lots of vocals
Just keep it interesting
0 couplets contributed by FLAtRich:
sometimes you can fix something by just shooting it into space
magnetic ships will carry us
to Level 5
where everyone lives happily
in celestial harmony
just floating there among the
spheres in Level 5
but down on Earth
in Belly Rave where cats and
rats eat better than
outlaws, outcasts and gypsy
orphans, left alone,
like atomic waste,
to break down
in a million years.
back to The Dark Ages for
you stupid magicians:
professors of absolute
certainty and greed.
crumbling dead flowers:
power turned off forever!
our gentle intellect will save us
on Level 5.
where scientists work hand in hand
perfecting modern man
magnetic ships will ferry us
to Level 5.
16 couplets contributed by COREY JENKINS:
Sometimes you can fix something by leaving it be
But you never learned that lesson
Sometimes you can fix something with X, Y, and Z
But you're stuck on A, B, and C
Sometimes you can fix something by just saying please
Maybe try to break a smile
Sometimes you can fix something if you just agree
Try to widen your perspective
Sometimes you can fix something by planting a tree
But you threw out all the seeds
Sometimes you can fix something with help from Staci
But you never got her number
Sometimes you can fix something with carrots and peas
Too bad you won't eat your veggies
Sometimes you can fix something by scraping your knees
Learn to let yourself fall down
Sometimes you can fix something with endless pleas
And maybe pizza as incentive
Sometimes you can fix something with a different set of keys
But you can't remember where you left them
Sometimes you can fix something by petting your kitty
But you left the front door open
Sometimes you can fix something if one and one made three
Too bad it's two and thats for certain
Sometimes you can fix something with honey from the bees
You've been stung too many times
Sometimes you can fix something with love from sweet Katie
When is she coming back from Boston?
Sometimes you can fix something with a shot of whiskey
And a double vodka chaser
Sometimes you can fix something if you would just leave
But you never learned how to take a hint
2 couplets contributed by OTIS BALL & THE CHAINS:
I think this is all the lyrics I sang. Some are mine, some are from Stronger Than Dirt Pete Moss. (His are the lyrics not capitalized.) Please credit him as a co composer? He'll lose his mind! He is a big fan of yours. I'm staying with him in Chicago. Also, I did some very minor editing on the spot. You'll hear them.
Love you!!!!
Otis
Sometimes you can fix something by completing a project, note to me with a shredded tee
Sometimes you can fix something by fighting for your meals, get your back into living.
Sometimes you can fix something by tossing a solo, to Mister KEITH HARTEL!
Sometimes you can fix something by breaking it down early …
Sometimes you can fix something by taking it to the bridge …
Sometimes you can fix something by sending out a demo. You might be giant.
Sometimes you can fix something by relocating. Jersey could be an adventure.
Sometimes you can fix something by staying with your brother. Blood can be salvation.
Sometimes you can fix something by working at Pier Platters. A rocking education.
Sometimes you can fix something by hanging with Bill Ryan. This should involve some college credits.
Sometimes you can fix something by calling in Butler. Greatest Chains ever.
Sometimes you can fix something by stealing the masters. Own the future mixes.
Sometimes you can fix something by just saying no, then you begin negotiations.
Sometimes you can fix something by just saying yes, why delay the situation?
Sometimes you can fix something with caffeine and duct tape, according to Paul Angelli.
sometimes you can fix something by putting on a show
the process is the destination
sometimes you can fix something by pretending not to know
in spite of every indication
sometimes you can fix something by just slacking off
let the others take the action
sometimes you can fix something by faking a cough
until you find yourself in traction
sometimes you can fix something by just hanging it up
don’t bother with elaboration
sometimes you can fix something by just tearing ’em down
and blame it on intoxication
sometimes you can fix something by just changing your name
and reassess the situation
sometimes you can fix something by just staying the same
just to confuse the conversation
sometimes you can fix something by a change of address
a temporary deviation
sometimes you can fix something by just making success
a matter of its definition
Sometimes you can fix something by waiting out a contract, patience is a virtue.
Sometimes you can fix something by walking on the water, boats can be high maintenance.
Sometimes you can fix something by kicking out a solo, lyrics can get boring.
Sometimes you can fix something by moving back home, home is where the heart is.
Sometimes you can fix something by working a gimmick. You might meet Mannix.
Sometimes you can fix something by getting the band back together, Super Karaoke Fun Time.
31 couplets contributed by CB - Back from lunch...:
sometimes you can fix something by just thinking small
i'm sure there's lots of good reasons
sometimes you can fix something by just working for yourself
not at some faceless corporation
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing their sign
I always fight with Sagittarians
sometime you can fix something by just pleading the fifth
avoiding self-incrimination
sometimes you can fix something by just ordering two
with extra cheese, pickles and onions
sometimes you can fix something otium cum dignitate
ya gotta know a little Latin
sometimes you can fix something by just starting to preach
with a timely Bibical quotation
sometimes you can fix something by just spreading the good word
convert the heathens and barbarians
sometimes you can fix something by not starting to preach
ain't got no time for Bible thumpin'
sometimes you can fix something with a good nom de punk
Armitage Shanks or Johnny Rotten
sometimes you can fix something with just a grain of salt
maintain a healthy skepticism
sometimes you can fix something by just defining your terms
eliminate confusion
sometimes you can fix something by something something something
i knew it once, but I've forgotten
sometimes you can fix something by just rockin' the boat
I'd like to know if you've got the notion
sometimes you can fix something by just having a smoke
nicotine is food, not an addiction
sometimes you can fix something by just brewing some beans
get some caffeine stimulation
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing where ya are
12 verses from the ending!
sometimes you can fix something by just using your head
go to experts, get opinions
sometimes you can fix something by just being polite
trust in reason and persuasion
sometimes you can fix something by just leaving it alone
let it stew in isolation
sometimes you can fix something by just holding a grudge
revenge is such a cool sensation
sometimes you can fix something by just changing its name
redefine the situation
sometimes you can fix something by just running away
avoid a messy confrontation
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a stand
but that's an awesome obligation
sometimes you can fix something by just starting a war
everybody at attention
sometimes you can fix something by just dancing all night
answers come out of exhaustion
sometimes you can fix something by just telling a lie
screw'em with mis-information
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a walk
take a break, take a vacation
sometimes you can fix something by turning the other cheek
that's what they tell ya in religion
sometimes you can fix something by just ripping it apart
maybe the damn thing wants attention
sometimes you can fix something by just smacking it around
it's a form of education
sometimes you can fix something by just giving up...
42 couplets contributed by John Nicholas and Brad Johnson:
Sometimes you can fix something by
Jacking up your car
Sometimes you can fix something by
Taking it too far
Sometimes you can fix something by
Eating a Klondike bar
Sometimes you can fix something by
Counting to ten
Sometimes you can fix something by
Sniffing your fingers
Sometimes you can fix something by
Then sniffing them again
Sometimes you can fix something by
Where have they been?
Sometimes you can fix something by
Wonder where they've been
Sometimes you can fix something by
Wearing a different hat
Sometimes you can fix something by
Petting your cat
Sometimes you can fix something by
not doing that
Sometimes you can fix something by
Don’t do that
Sometimes you can fix something by
You won’t like what happens next
Sometimes you can fix something by
Don’t do that
Sometimes you can fix something by
You won't like what happens next
Sometimes you can fix something by
Tearing it apart
Sometimes you can fix something by
Speaking from the heart
Sometimes you can fix something by
Starting from the start
Sometimes you can fix something by
Wearing fancy clothes
Sometimes you can fix something by
Powdering your nose
Sometimes you can fix something by
Speaking clever prose
Sometimes you can fix something by
To be or not to be
Sometimes you can fix something by
Looking at yourself
Sometimes you can fix something by
Making silly faces
Sometimes you can fix something by
Changing your perspective
Sometimes you can fix something by
Giving a second glance
Sometimes you can fix something by
Doing a safety dance
Sometimes you can fix something by
Put a chicken in a trance
Sometimes you can fix something by
Staying out of sight
Sometimes you can fix something by
Fastening your safety belt
Sometimes you can fix something by
Taking the first flight
Sometimes you can fix something by
Filling it with fuel
Sometimes you can fix something by
And controlling it's combustion
Sometimes you can fix something by
Calling the Dayman AHH AHHH AHH
Sometimes you can fix something by
Fighter of the Nightman AHH AHHH AHHH
Sometimes you can fix something by
By making a Rum Ham
Sometimes you can fix something by
Rum Ham Rum Ham
Sometimes you can fix something by
Yummy Yummy
Sometimes you can fix something by
Rum Ham
Sometimes you can fix something by
Rum Ham Rum Ham
Sometimes you can fix something by
Yummy Yummy
Sometimes you can fix something by
Rum Ham
90 couplets contributed by Chris Butler:
sometimes you can fix something by just building a ramp
if you have the inclination!
sometimes you can fix something by just sitting around
ideas come from relaxation
sometimes you can fix something by just blowing it up
the world reacts to provocation
sometimes you can fix something by just takin' it slow
our culture loves procrastination
sometimes you can fix something by just hurrying up
we worship instant solutions
sometimes you can fix something by just looking away
Zen Buddhist in-attention
sometimes you can fix something with just a mistake
don't get too hung-up on perfection
sometimes you can fix something by just doing it right
craftsmanship requires precision
sometimes you can fix something with total control
aim for global domination
sometimes you can fix something by just playing along
give 'em enough rope to hang 'em
sometimes you can fix something by just working like hell
that will not hurt your reputation
sometimes you can fix something by not working too hard
burn-out is a real problem
sometimes you can fix something by just having faith
sometimes miracles can happen
sometimes you can fix something by just saying a prayer
wait for divine intervention
sometimes you can fix something by just trusting your luck
roll them bones and see what happens
sometimes you can fix something by just being a cheat
mastermind the final outcome
sometimes you can fix something by just being tough
ya gotta learn ta take rejection
sometimes you can fix something by just being scared
heroes never seem to live long
sometimes you can fix something by just taking a class
learn new techniques, new information
sometimes you can fix something by just building a wall
there's such a thing as too much freedom
sometimes you can fix something by tightening your belt
learn to live within restrictions
sometimes you can fix something by just busting loose
don't let 'em squish your self-expression
sometimes you can fix something by just shutting up
let someone smarter do the talking
sometimes you can fix something by just coming in last
but wait 'til next season
sometimes you can fix something by just holding out
wear away the opposition
sometimes you can fix something by just being a fool
innocence trumps sophistication
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing the law
when they try and pull a fast one
sometimes you can fix something by just screening your calls
they're always tryin' ta sell ya somethin’
sometimes you can fix something by just washing your hands
eliminate contamination
sometimes you can fix something by just wearing a mask
sometimes it's best ta keep 'em guessing
sometimes you can fix something by just going to hell
pave it with the best intentions
sometimes you can fix something by just telling all
exorcize your deepest demons
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "no"
take an intractable position
sometimes you can fix something by just saying "yes"
if they can meet all your conditions
sometimes you can fix something with just the right spin
make 'em question what they're seeing
sometimes you can fix something by just changing your mind
there's nothing wrong with indecision
sometimes you can fix something by just building a fort
hunker down for the duration
sometimes you can fix something by just changing sides
if you can't beat 'em...join 'em
sometimes you can fix something by just getting laid
orgasm releases tension
sometimes you can fix something by just jacking off
you can't get AIDS from masturbation
sometimes you can fix something by just getting drunk
a cure for mental constipation
sometimes you can fix something by just having one drink
everything in moderation
sometimes you can fix something by just taking the heat
or get out of the kitchen
sometimes you can fix something by just passing the buck
blame it on another person
sometimes you can fix something by just turning around
try a mid-course correction
sometimes you can fix something by just trying to cope
with patience, tact and stoicism
sometimes you can fix something by just starting to cry
people can't take raw emotions
sometimes you can fix something by running from your past
join the French Foreign Legion
sometimes you can fix something by just turning a knob
volume is a weapon
sometimes you can fix something by just toning it down
too much too fast might overwhelm 'em
sometimes you can fix something by just giving a gift
mollify the opposition
sometimes you can fix something by just taking it back
ya don't wanna spoil 'em
sometimes you can fix something by just playing dumb
try to get off with a warning
sometimes you can fix something by just being sharp
stall with a brilliant explanation
sometimes you can fix something by just going to church
maybe God will pay attention
Refrain
sometimes you can fix something by just being a prick
winning by intimidation
sometimes you can fix something by just lifting your skirt
it's the ultimate distraction
V
i poke button
i want action
let's hear some gears and see some smoke
no dilly-dally
move your heiny
this is the age of "go for broke"
Refrain
sometimes you can fix something by just kissing some ass
if you don't mind humiliation
sometimes you can fix something by just smoking a pipe
academic contemplation
V2
so pathetic no mechanic
no steady eye, no magic touch
no screwdriver
ball peen hammer
mr. fix-it's gone to lunch
Extension 1
not personal?
yeah it's personal..
what did i ever do to you?
no crap from
contraptions
just do what i tell you to do
Refrain x 2
sometimes you can fix something by just blaming your mom
everybody loves a victim
sometimes you can fix something by just cracking a joke
humor is greasy lubrication
sometimes you can fix something by just cooking the books
wealth is all about perception
sometimes you can fix something by just smoking a joint
stoner free association
Solo
V3
broke down, lifeless
junkyard worthless
no tweezer jesus in the house
so desperate
so dependent
pay any price to dope it out
Extension2
i want genius
i wanna suss
the perfect kluge, the devil glitch
oh, hosanna
socket messiah
the only jesus worth a shit
sometimes you can fix something by not going to church
I've met too many evil Christians
sometimes you can fix something by just being against being against the establishment of the church
antidisestablishmentarianism
sometimes you can fix something by just suing the son of a bitch
tie 'em up in litigation
sometimes you can fix something by just going home
maybe the answer's back in Cleveland
sometimes you can fix something by hot-wiring the fuse
tho you may risk electrocution
sometimes you can fix something with just a better glue
high coefficient of adhesion
sometimes you can fix something by just paying 'em off
then get on with what you're doing
sometimes you can fix something by not being home
avoid unwanted solicitations
sometimes you can fix something by just having the stones
if you can't get no satisfaction
sometimes you can fix something by just listening to The Who
sing "my my gen gen gen er a tion"
sometimes you can't fix something by just playing pinball
tho Tommy's such a stupid album
sometimes you can fix something by just speaking your mind
that right is in the constitution
sometimes you can fix something by just biting your tongue
they say silence is golden
sometimes you can fix something by just writing a book
go on talk shows 'round the nation
sometimes you can fix something by just reading a book
turn off that goddam television
sometimes you can fix something by just having a snack
hunger wrecks your concentration
Sometimes you can fix something by just killing the joke
Yes that’s a banana, and no not glad to see ya
Sometimes you can fix something by just checking it out
Check it out check it out check it out
Sometimes you can fix something by just paying the rent
Avoid the trauma of eviction
Sometimes you can fix something by just remembering that something needs fixing
A Post-It note or string ‘round your finger
Sometimes you can fix something by just using a GPS
If you can stand ‘lectronic nagging
Sometimes you can fix something by just going to the beach
But please don’t talk to the lifeguard
Sometimes you can fix something by just hitting the slopes
Otherwise…what’s the point of winter?
Sometimes you can fix something by just shaving your legs
A small concession to beauty
Sometimes you can fix something by just not shaving your legs
Revolt against the myth of beauty
Sometimes you can fix something by just watching the skies
Look out for alien invaders
Sometimes you can fix something by just playing alien invaders
Retro arcade games are groovy
Sometimes you can fix something with please and thank you
Being polite ain’t gonna kill ya
Sometimes you can fix something by just doin’ the right thing
It will make you feel better
Sometimes you can fix something by just expecting respect
I don’t just want it, I demand it.
Sometimes you can fix something by just betting everything ya got
Got to be in it to win it
Sometimes you can fix something by just counting your blessings
Tho you’ll still be a cynic.
23 couplets contributed by Mrs. Irene Elizabeth Butler:
sometimes you can fix something by just being possessed
by parasitic aliens
sometimes you can fix something by just being attacked
by an interstellar infestation
sometimes you can fix something by having an evil twin
oh...that one
sometimes you can fix something by traveling in time
escape into the 4th dimension
sometimes you can fix something with any of the above
all cheesy Star Trek plot inventions
sometimes you can fix something by just willing it fixed
they really study this at Princeton
sometimes you can fix something by just knowing your roots
my ethnic background is suburban
sometimes you can fix something by just wearing a hat
a derby or a turban
sometimes you can fix something with a better rhyme than that
believe me, I'm trying
sometimes you can fix everything with a smart drummer
tho that's an oxymoron
sometimes you can fix something by just being a spud
the truth about de-evolution
sometimes you can fix something by always landing on your feet
just like Buster Keaton
sometimes you can fix something by just ordering out
Cantonese, Hunan or Schezuan
sometimes you can fix something by just listing your strengths
also too many to mention
sometimes you can fix something by just listing your faults
is that an ego deflating?
sometimes you can fix something with just some flower tops
chamomile or echinacea
sometimes you can fix something by just changing your blood
flush out all those toxins
sometimes you can fix something by just going “boom”
that’s supposed to be an explosion
sometimes you can fix something by just saying “what’s goin’ on?”
stop all this commotion
sometimes you can fix something by saying “excuse me, dear”
“pass the suntan lotion”
sometimes you can fix something by staring off into space
dreams are the mother of creation
sometimes you can fix something by going overseas
but what's the point of Belgium?
sometimes you can fix something by just thinking big
that's a strategy for winning
8 couplets contributed by Tyler Zahnke:
Sometimes you can fix something just by listening to Cher,
Do you believe in life after love?
Sometimes you can fix something just by praying to the lord,
Even you come from above
Sometimes you can fix something just by talking on the phone,
To the one that truly understands you
Sometimes you can fix something just by being alone,
See where in the world it lands you
Sometimes you can fix something just by listening to tapes,
Keep your mind of new stuff like mp3
Sometimes you can fix something just by forgetting about the Democrats,
Listen to Rush Limbaugh and vote GOP
Sometimes you can fix something just by being a geek,
Edit Wikipedia rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something just by putting on a show,
Like a comedy with Dick Van Dyke
9 couplets contributed by Amanda Thorpe:
sometimes you can fix things by walking away
no need for consultations
sometimes you can fix some things by just being a bitch
it can release hypertension
sometimes you can fix some things by just taking a breath
you don't need a revelation
sometimes you can fix some things by just walking the dog
get your head some oxygenation
sometimes you fix these things by just being an ass
they don’t always deserve much better
sometimes you fix these things by just falling out of a plane
you never know what could happen
sometimes you fix things by flicking a switch
there’s nothing like illumination
sometimes you fix things by just changing your specs
rose times went out with Ronald Raygun
sometimes you fix things by getting off stage
I think that time has come now
sometimes you fix some things by shutting up
19 couplets contributed by Rebecca Turner:
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a cat
The soft fur is relaxing
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a goat
Though he might eat your shoelaces
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting an owl
Get some wiseness by osmosis
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a dog
(beat) Like petting god, but backwards
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a gnu
They like to start things very quietly
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a fox
They are totally fantastic
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a horse
You might just see a different color
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a cow
Maybe he'll give you a good milkshake
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting some swine
Just keep a tight grip on your pearls
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a snake
They can help you smooth it over
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a bee
She might sting some sense into you
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting an ant
pet ant pet ant pet ant pet ant
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a sloth
The view from upside-down's inspiring
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a schmoo
Fry it up, it tastes like chicken
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a whale
Their size will put it in perspective
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a moose.
And share a healthy meal of berries
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a clam.
Turns out you didn't need that finger
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a quail.
Don't get between it and Dick Cheney.
Sometimes you can fix something by just petting a flea.
Or squash it and a cat will thank you.
11 couplets contributed by Mike iLL:
Sometimes ya can fix something by removing the melody
So no one notices you're tone deaf
Sometimes ya can fix something by ignoring the rhyme scheme
So you can focus on the substance
Sometimes ya can fix something by making up the words as ya go
So you can sound rather hesitant
Sometimes you can fix something by getting little girls dressed in the morning
So you can go out to the craft store
Sometimes you can fix something by making them record something
"Can you put my shoes on me, Daddy?" Of course, darling.
Sometimes you can fix something by asking the older one to say something (say something)
And then she's shy
Sometimes ya can fix something by pressing the stop button
And saying, "Rinah, would you please say something?"
Sometimes you can fix something by letting the dog out in the backyard
So he can poop and pee in the morning
Sometimes ya can fix something by waking up early enough
To have a little bit of down time.
Sometimes you can fix something by staying up late enough
To make up something that is a meaningless rhyme or a crime
Oh Gosh, I'm stuck in the rhyme circle of meaninglessness
Noooooooo! Stop!
8 couplets contributed by Maiku:
Sometimes you can fix something by letting it all out,
That's what I love from George Rhubarb
Sometimes you can fix something by taking a walk in the park,
And turn off the television
Sometimes you can fix something by making a fool of yourself,
And lose all your inhibitions
Sometimes you can fix something by losing your faith,
All wars are based on religions
Sometimes you can fix something by just going out and party,
As long as you don't do something criminal
Sometimes you can fix something by overthrowing Prop 8,
Denying happiness to some is un-Constitutional
Sometimes you can fix something by not following song structure,
"Whose Line Is It Anyway?" was a great show, Rhubarb was awesome it should never have been taken off the air
Sometimes you can fix something by keeping your mouth shut,
" "